Linguistic Funnies

[Tc Frorleivus Almus Ph]

Ever pick up a newspaper and read the comics? I used to do that with my grandmother on Sundays, and we'd always call that part of the paper "the funnies".
So, that said, let's make our own, but our way.

Know a good joke involving another language? Or even a bad one? All are welcome!
I know a few, and some of them are quite silly. I'mma post them anyway so that after I've made a fool of myself, you won't be so afraid to submit your own.

A Roman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a "martinus".
"Don't you mean a 'martini'?" the bartender asks.
"No," says the Roman. "If I wanted more than one, I would've said so."
;}

Your turn! What have you got?  

[Shiina-kun]

Haha that made me chuckle. Sadly, I don't know of any linguistic funnies (all I know are a couple of rakugo), but I may end up making some of these into mini comic strips in the future!  

[The_Brightest_Moon]

Here's a good Japanese one:

"Wow, that picture is pretty, 絵？”

Another one,

"Oh hey, it's spring! 春 doin?"  

[Tc Frorleivus Almus Ph]

emikodo

Haha that made me chuckle. Sadly, I don't know of any linguistic funnies (all I know are a couple of rakugo), but I may end up making some of these into mini comic strips in the future!

That sounds like fun! So long as they're funny, then let there be rakugo!

The_Brightest_Moon

Here's a good Japanese one:

"Wow, that picture is pretty, 絵？”

Another one,

"Oh hey, it's spring! 春 doin?"

I have a friend from Hokkaidou, and he is one of those guys who's just really good at being cute, no matter what he does. Once he greeted me with 「おハッロ！」He was never good with time zones, so he used to just address me with "good morning!" in gratuitous English every time we spoke, despite that it was rarely morning for me when we did. So I believe that he started to do this in lieu of that, since it's similar to morning but isn't the same phrase. ;p  

[Chirapaq]

Haha, good one Shizuka

 

[Shiina-kun]

Well, if rakugo is okay...

＜整形手術（せいけいしゅじゅつ）＞

主婦Ａ：お隣（おとなり）の奥さん交通（こうつう）事故（じこ）にあわれて、顔をケガされたんですって。
主婦Ｂ：まぁ、お気の毒（どく）に。
主婦Ａ：でも、整形手術（せいけいしゅじゅつ）で元（もと）の顔にもどったんですって。
主婦Ｂ：まぁ、お気の毒（どく）に。

"I heard that our neighbor, Mrs. X, got into a car accident and got her face injured/disfigured."
"Oh, no! That's awful."
"But, I heard that the plastic surgeon helped her face recover, and now she looks just like before."
"Oh, no! That's awful!!"  

[Tc Frorleivus Almus Ph]

emikodo

Well, if rakugo is okay...

＜整形手術（せいけいしゅじゅつ）＞

主婦Ａ：お隣（おとなり）の奥さん交通（こうつう）事故（じこ）にあわれて、顔をケガされたんですって。
主婦Ｂ：まぁ、お気の毒（どく）に。
主婦Ａ：でも、整形手術（せいけいしゅじゅつ）で元（もと）の顔にもどったんですって。
主婦Ｂ：まぁ、お気の毒（どく）に。

"I heard that our neighbor, Mrs. X, got into a car accident and got her face injured/disfigured."
"Oh, no! That's awful."
"But, I heard that the plastic surgeon helped her face recover, and now she looks just like before."
"Oh, no! That's awful!!"

Hah! Perfect. :}

Now I've got another! Since this one actually requires some mild Latin experience, I'll have to explain at the end.

Did you hear what all the frogs in the pond said of the one who learned to write Latin prose?

They said of him, "scribit, scribit."

(From "scribere," meaning "to write." "Scribit" would effectively mean "he writes." ;D)  

[MrJamesXOXO]

In my Language (Filipino)
One syllable conversation

A person asking the Elevator Staff if the elevator would go down or go up

Person: Baba ba?
[Goind down?]
Staff: Baba
[Down]
Hehe. Baby talk.
 

[Tc Frorleivus Almus Ph]

Lady Maygumi

In my Language (Filipino)
One syllable conversation

A person asking the Elevator Staff if the elevator would go down or go up

Person: Baba ba?
[Goind down?]
Staff: Baba
[Down]
Hehe. Baby talk.

Hah! That's great.  

[The_Brightest_Moon]

Lady Maygumi

In my Language (Filipino)
One syllable conversation

A person asking the Elevator Staff if the elevator would go down or go up

Person: Baba ba?
[Goind down?]
Staff: Baba
[Down]
Hehe. Baby talk.

That is wonderful.  

[Houkou Ookami]

There's a similar thing in Japanese making fun of Kansaieben.



Here's a romanisation + translation of the main body of the comic (panels are read right->left, top->bottom). I didn't translate the little side captions because the English translation pretty much says the same thing they do. Warning: strong language.

1:
Customer: Nan ya kore? (What the heck is this? [If he had phrased it "Kore nan ya?" it wouldn't have come off as provocative.])
Merchant: "Nan ya to!" (Whaddaya mean, "What the heck is this!")

2:
Officer: Mou, nan ya nan ya. (Hey, calm down, calm down.)
Customer (to merchant): Naan yaa (What?!)
Merchant: Neean yaa (What!!)

3:
Customer: "Nan ya to" o?! (How dare you ask me "whaddaya mean!!")
Merchant: Nan ya?! (What was that?!)

4:
Officer: Nan ya? Nan ya nen. (What on earth is this about?)
Merchant: NAAAN YA NEN (Mind your own damn business!)

5:
Customer: Nan ya?! (What's your problem?!)
Merchant: Nan ya?! (What's YOUR problem?!)

6:
Officer: Nan ya nen te nan ya (What the hell do you mean, mind your own damn business?!)
Merchant: NAN YA (You wanna go, too?!)
Customer: NAN YAAAAAAAAAA!! (Don't you ignore me!)

7:
Person 1: Nan ya (What's this?)
Person 2: Nan ya (What's going on?)
Person 3: Nan ya nan ya (Oh my, what's happening?)
Person 4: Nan ya kenka ya te (It seems to be a fight of some sort.)
Person 5: Nan ya (A fight, huh.)

8: Owari nan ya. (The end.)  

[Tc Frorleivus Almus Ph]

Houkou Ookami

There's a similar thing in Japanese making fun of Kansaieben.



Here's a romanisation + translation of the main body of the comic (panels are read right->left, top->bottom). I didn't translate the little side captions because the English translation pretty much says the same thing they do. Warning: strong language.

1:
Customer: Nan ya kore? (What the heck is this? [If he had phrased it "Kore nan ya?" it wouldn't have come off as provocative.])
Merchant: "Nan ya to!" (Whaddaya mean, "What the heck is this!")

2:
Officer: Mou, nan ya nan ya. (Hey, calm down, calm down.)
Customer (to merchant): Naan yaa (What?!)
Merchant: Neean yaa (What!!)

3:
Customer: "Nan ya to" o?! (How dare you ask me "whaddaya mean!!")
Merchant: Nan ya?! (What was that?!)

4:
Officer: Nan ya? Nan ya nen. (What on earth is this about?)
Merchant: NAAAN YA NEN (Mind your own damn business!)

5:
Customer: Nan ya?! (What's your problem?!)
Merchant: Nan ya?! (What's YOUR problem?!)

6:
Officer: Nan ya nen te nan ya (What the hell do you mean, mind your own damn business?!)
Merchant: NAN YA (You wanna go, too?!)
Customer: NAN YAAAAAAAAAA!! (Don't you ignore me!)

7:
Person 1: Nan ya (What's this?)
Person 2: Nan ya (What's going on?)
Person 3: Nan ya nan ya (Oh my, what's happening?)
Person 4: Nan ya kenka ya te (It seems to be a fight of some sort.)
Person 5: Nan ya (A fight, huh.)

8: Owari nan ya. (The end.)

This makes me think about how the postman makes that single noise when he "talks" in Majora's Mask. He's secretly from the Kansai region and is carrying on a conversation while we think he's just babbling nonsense!  

[Blade Lorenz]

My family called them "the Funnies", too.


Here's one - it's bad though... English/German.

English Person: "What comes between 'fear and sex'?"
German Person: ".... Fünf."



(I am not sure if I need to explain this one, but just in case, here goes: "Fünf" is the German word for "five", whilst the english "fear" and "sex" kinda sound like the German "Vier" [4] and "Sechs" [6], sooo... Hey, I said it was bad, didn't I?)  

[Tc Frorleivus Almus Ph]

Blade Lorenz

My family called them "the Funnies", too.


Here's one - it's bad though... English/German.

English Person: "What comes between 'fear and sex'?"
German Person: ".... Fünf."



(I am not sure if I need to explain this one, but just in case, here goes: "Fünf" is the German word for "five", whilst the english "fear" and "sex" kinda sound like the German "Vier" [4] and "Sechs" [6], sooo... Hey, I said it was bad, didn't I?)

Don't worry; I understood.
And no, it wasn't bad. ;B  

[AkaTsuki-chan]

Blade Lorenz

My family called them "the Funnies", too.


Here's one - it's bad though... English/German.

English Person: "What comes between 'fear and sex'?"
German Person: ".... Fünf."



(I am not sure if I need to explain this one, but just in case, here goes: "Fünf" is the German word for "five", whilst the english "fear" and "sex" kinda sound like the German "Vier" [4] and "Sechs" [6], sooo... Hey, I said it was bad, didn't I?)

I might have missed it without the explanation - nice job!