I need help.

[Silent Expressor]

About a month ago i told this girl that ive been crazy about for 6 years exactally how i felt about her, I told her how i felt close to 2 weeks after her boyfriend of 3 months broke up with her. So for awhile i was waiting to ask her out because she was on the rebound. Then recently i was talking to her and i asked her if she ever felt like i was leading her on. She said that she did because i was flirting with another girl in front of her that i knew liked me. I didnt mean to flirt with the other girl, i didnt really see it as flirting until the girl said something to me. Now she thinks that i like the other girl (which i dont) and i dont know what to do. I didnt mean to hurt her, and i dont know how to make it right. Ive already apologized a few times but i dont know if she forgives me yet. If anyone can give me advise on what to do it would greatly be appreciated  

[HonorBoundKnight]

I would suggest, first of all, that if this girl thinks you were flirting with another girl, that rather than just being oblivious you purposefully go out of your way NOT to flirt with that girl. (Though not to the extent of being rude.)

Then, on the subject of the girl you actually do like, I suggest you try to get some time alone with her and talk your way through this. Explain that you don't like the other girl that way, you didn't know what you were doing was interpreted as flirting, and ask her if she has forgiven you, etc. Ask HER what you can do to make things right. And don't allow yourself to give up too easily. (Ex- "Hey can we talk?" "No." "Okay, bye.")  

[S.a.m.b.o.]

Buy her flowers.

 

[Silent Expressor]

HonorBoundKnight

I would suggest, first of all, that if this girl thinks you were flirting with another girl, that rather than just being oblivious you purposefully go out of your way NOT to flirt with that girl. (Though not to the extent of being rude.)

Then, on the subject of the girl you actually do like, I suggest you try to get some time alone with her and talk your way through this. Explain that you don't like the other girl that way, you didn't know what you were doing was interpreted as flirting, and ask her if she has forgiven you, etc. Ask HER what you can do to make things right. And don't allow yourself to give up too easily. (Ex- "Hey can we talk?" "No." "Okay, bye.")

Ive already tried to explain to her that i dont like the other girl in that way. But because of what happened with her ex boy friend she dosnt believe me.  

[Silent Expressor]

Shafroogle

Buy her flowers.

I would buy her flowers but someone told me that girls interpret flowers as a sign of commitment...and although i want there to be commitment between us i still dont think that she is ready...  

[HonorBoundKnight]

Holypimp

HonorBoundKnight

I would suggest, first of all, that if this girl thinks you were flirting with another girl, that rather than just being oblivious you purposefully go out of your way NOT to flirt with that girl. (Though not to the extent of being rude.)

Then, on the subject of the girl you actually do like, I suggest you try to get some time alone with her and talk your way through this. Explain that you don't like the other girl that way, you didn't know what you were doing was interpreted as flirting, and ask her if she has forgiven you, etc. Ask HER what you can do to make things right. And don't allow yourself to give up too easily. (Ex- "Hey can we talk?" "No." "Okay, bye.")

Ive already tried to explain to her that i dont like the other girl in that way. But because of what happened with her ex boy friend she dosnt believe me.

All right- like I said, go out of your way not to do anything that could be considered flirting with the other girl, and try to be just a friend to the girl you like. Show her, by example, that you mean what you say. And approach her again after she's had a little bit of time to get over her ex.  

[Ricette]

React. Simply buy her something nice. Not over the top but something simple and meaningful apologize big time, sit her down and explain to her how you feel for her, what you did with the other girl, and just do it at stops. Don't rush to do it all at once. Give her time to digest each bit. Day by day show her more and more how you feel. But most importatnly give her space to get over her guy. BUt just be nice about it, no forcing yourself into her life, none of that. Be gentle yet constant in showing her your intentions.  

[Silent Expressor]

Hey, thanks all for the advise, and i will think about what everyone said, if anyone else has any advise that hasnt been mentioned yet i would like to hear it.


-God bless and thanks  

[Silent Expressor]

Since the last time i posted in this thread, things have gotten steadily worse with this girl. I havent talked to her in over 2 weeks and my friendship with her is virtually destroyed. I dont know what to do anymore.  

[Mebius]

Holypimp

Shafroogle

Buy her flowers.

I would buy her flowers but someone told me that girls interpret flowers as a sign of commitment...and although i want there to be commitment between us i still dont think that she is ready...

There are many different types of flowers; give her a speical yellow rose for friendship 3nodding  

[Silent Expressor]

Hey all. Just thought i could update you on the whole situation with this girl. Since the last time I posted I told her that my friendship with her was the most important thing right now so i would be putting my feelings aside until we are both ready to try to be more than friends. Also I went to boston for three days with my church youth group and made her a teddy bear at one of those build a bear shops. I also took her to see rent and she said she might go to prom with me this year (Keeping my fingers crossed) Thanks for all of the advise everybody xd

-God Bless  

[Roseknight13]

I've been in your position twice before... what you want to do is: talk to her, let her know that you'd never do anything that would hurt her... let her know she is the only girl that you want right now... if she doesn't believe you still, ask her to hangout with you one day, and show her how much you care for her... let her know through your actions more than through your words... Whatever you do... don't say "I love you" until you know that she loves you and is wanting to commit to you... My Beloved and I Deeply love eachother... but we haven't started dating yet... Because we are building ourselves to trust eachother 100%... talk to your beloved... ask her what you can do to build her trust... let her know how she can build yours... it will draw you two together 'cause just asking how you can build it up will make her trust you more.  

[Silent Expressor]

Roseknight13

I've been in your position twice before... what you want to do is: talk to her, let her know that you'd never do anything that would hurt her... let her know she is the only girl that you want right now... if she doesn't believe you still, ask her to hangout with you one day, and show her how much you care for her... let her know through your actions more than through your words... Whatever you do... don't say "I love you" until you know that she loves you and is wanting to commit to you... My Beloved and I Deeply love eachother... but we haven't started dating yet... Because we are building ourselves to trust eachother 100%... talk to your beloved... ask her what you can do to build her trust... let her know how she can build yours... it will draw you two together 'cause just asking how you can build it up will make her trust you more.

Since all of this has happened I have asked her to hang out and we have, Our friendship before had no foundation which is why it was almost destroyed by what happened. But now we've begun to trust each other more so I would say now that our friendship is founded on trust. As far as not telling her I love her but showing her that I love her. Since this whole situation has happened Ive begun acting more like I love her but at the same time i have told her on numerous occasions that I do love her and she dosnt get put off by that. My feelings for her have gone away and resurfaced many times in the last 7 years. I can honestly say now that I truly do love her and I would do anything for her. Thanks for the advise

-God Bless