It's possible but I wouldn't count on it. When you stop taking T, your fat distribution goes back, but it may not go back "all the way" if that makes sense. Plus it can take a long time for it to go back, depending on how long you take the T.
But really, you can't pick and choose effects. You can't count on anything.
True.
My thought was that the parts I want to change - hair, voice, face - are maybe at least semi-likely to happen sooner, since I'm pretty hairy to begin with (gotta love those french/Jewish/Cuban genes) and the men in my family have really deep voices so that's hopefully a good indicator for that. The facial structure thing I know is a stretch either way, since I know it doesn't happen very much at all even over a long time for some people and the men in my family are also kinda baby-faced anyways. I could also help the muscle mass thing along if I just started working out finally. I've been reading lots of online journals and blogs guys have kept of their progress on T and it seems like the things I'm wanting to have happen often do so within as little as a year or even less. So it would be a bit of a leap of faith where my poor hips are concerned, but just starting and seeing what happens is looking like my best option here.
Plus, of course, I'll be sure to work it out with whatever doctor I end up seeing.
I was wondering if anyone had seen the movie "Albert Nobbs"?
Spoilers:
I think that Albert is trans but Mr. Page is just a cross-dressing lesbian. But I can't be certaian maybe Albert is the crossdresser and Mr. Page is actually trans. Or they're both just crossdressers. It could be anything.
I tried looking up information about the gender identities, but it's all over the place. Some is even really transphobic. For the most part though, it seems as though Albert is defined as a woman who lives as a man out of convenience alone.
The movie takes place in 19th century Ireland, so sexism was quite rampant. It makes sense people did that. But the way the character is played, idk. It feels like something else.
Anyway I was wondering if anyone else had seen this movie and what they thought if they had.
And also, if you haven't seen this movie, you should. It's really good. SUPER SAD, but really a great film. It's about the waiter, Albert Nobbs, and his life living like he does.
I wanted to see that when it came out, but of course I didn't manage and then I forgot about it. I'll have to search it out now, though biggrin
I was reading the replies on this, though, and I don't know the absolute most about trans lifestyles at that time, but I know a bit (I study history and Victorian Europe is my vice). There did seem to be a fair amount of trans people around at that point, although mostly if they were out they were performers or escorts - so not the most progressive situations in terms of trans rights. Plus, I dont think it was very recognized as an actual thing and was seen as more an eccentricity or something homosexual men did for their Homosexual Men Reasons™.
On another note, crossdressing was a pretty common thing for lesbians to do - women who dressed in really sharp men's clothing and slicked their hair back were basically the "butch d-kes" of the time. Although it's still difficult to say whether some of them weren't actually trans men but with no context for their gender experience. So, I'll haveto see the movie for context!
I'm really excited for the Danish Girl, especially since Eddie Redmayne is such a fantastic actor and I feel like he'll really handle the role with a lot of respect. It'll be a nice change from some of the inaccurately written, offensive crap we've had to put up with from Hollywood recently (Jared Leto's trans woman character... wasn't her name 'clorox' or something? That was a train wreck). I'm loving the trend of period movies about trans characters, though. My favourite things emotion_kirakira
On that topic, does anyone watch Penny Dreadful, there's a trans girl named Angelique in it during the second season, and she's the most precious thing. She's (surprise) an escort, and I believe the brothel she's in is supposed to be exclusively trans girls? It wasnt very clear since they only showed it once and I couldn't really tell whether or not the background characters were also trans, but anyway. I did really appreciate that the brothel was a really nice, lavish one for once. Trans women living in seedy squalor is not a comforting trope.
I had a day yesterday. Want to hear about it? For the most part it was filled with the joy-est of all joys.
Yesterday morning, my girlfriend was determined to come out to her neighbors. They share a driveway, and my gf is always going places as herself. However, she was quite nervous about going places as herself ever since they started sharing a driveway (they bought houses next to each other after having been neighbors already for years). The neighbors are like family friends. This new driveway situation was causing her to suddenly burst out crying at any given moment, and I was very concerned and would help her whenever she needed at those times.
But yesterday, she had me write out a letter to her neighbors because my handwriting is neat and according to her, her handwriting is like a "drunken five year old's". I tried my very best, and we attached the letter to a tupperware of brownies we had made. That's when things got real-real, and she freaked. I was like, "hey, let's drop this off before your therapy appointment" but she drove right past their house, lol, saying they "were not home" and I smiled and said "that's okay". Because it was.
We discussed when to drop off the note and brownies, and we spent all day out doing things, avoiding the situation at hand. I get why, totally. Finally, after a nice and calming date at a Mexican restaurant with live music, I held the note up and said "we're gonna do this" and she freaked again of course and decided to drink like 8 shots of whiskey. I was like, "you ready?" and she giggled and was "yup, liquid courage. No fear". But I still had to practically drag her by the hand to her neighbors' house (literally, I dragged her by her hand as she gently and nervously protested).
What followed was us out in the shivering cold for 10 minutes with her backing away (still attached to my hand) and whispering, "I'm scared" amongst giggles and smiles. I eventually got her to ring the doorbell, but the neighbors were not home. So we wedged the brownies between their screen door and front door and walked home.
Five minutes later, we get a knock on our door and we answer it and lo and behold its the neighbors smiling gently at us. The first words out of their mouth was, "oh, don't be scared, we understand. We already suspected. We saw you with make-up before. We've got a friend who's son is going through this, too, so we know about this kind of stuff already. I bet that was really hard. Are you okay?"
I was like, all secretly, "yesssssss". So we had a nice chat where I came out also as myself and as my gf's boyfriend and they invited us over for Thanksgiving.
Later on, my gf kept whispering "thank you" to me very sweetly and I just told her "any time you need it, love".
However also later on, the neighbors sent her a text about me, saying they hadn't expected a girl to have such bad handwriting and didn't know I was a boy when they saw me and they saw "a girl" (meaning me) and they used the feminine spelling of my name, "Bobbie" instead of "Bobby". This caused me to freak out. I'm so so glad they accept her, they even corrected themselves when they said "he" to her by mistake, but could they be a little sexist in accepting me? I don't know. The text was apologetic in tone, so I hope this is going to resolve itself.
Because of the text I freaked out, as I said, crying and hugging my girlfriend about how I betted if I didn't have these boobs I wouldn't be clocked as female so bad, how surgeons have treated me as 100% female even with their experience with trans men, all that. How I bet people think I'm hyper-female somehow, a form of discrimination, because my breasts are so huge. I don't know, really. But I do know that my boobs trigger most of my trans-related depression, and its gotta stop. So my girlfriend said we're in this together, and we're going to somehow get the money for my surgery and I said it would take me ten years to get the money with my income and I can't save more than $2000 on disability without it being taken away, and I can't take it for ten more years living like this, not living, all that. So she said the most incredible thing, which is "I'll sign the medical loan, I don't care, I'll do whatever it takes". I like those words, but will it happen? I don't doubt her of course, but my depression makes me doubtful that I'll ever get to live my life.
But today I may be going to a transgender day of remembrance service at a very lgbt-progressive church and I think there is also a dedication at the transgender memorial garden here in St Louis. It depends on if my girlfriend is too tired from work or not, as its right after she gets home from work. I'll let you know if we go and what happened, if you want to know.
You and your girlfriend are so cute together. I think the neighbors will know better now about using the right pronouns, I hope it works out!! emotion_hug Feel better soon.
My chest is really the only thing that gives me dysphoria these days. I used to not mind it, but being misgendered and hearing really ignorant statements, especially from close friends has really started to affect me. I really hate it. I'm not considering surgery because that's money and I don't ever plan on coming out to my family, though I can probably lie about it when I'm older, snorts. It's still difficult though. The other day my friend offered me a free binder, so I hope it makes the difference. Annnd I hope my chest stops growing sobs.
Hey, so I'm getting top surgery in a few days and I was wondering if anyone whose already had it could tell me a bit about recovery? Like tips and stuff, how long I should wait before moving around a lot, really what to expect, or really anything?
(I know I really should have looked into this earlier but whatever razz)
Pretty much just follow the instructions the surgeon says for post-op care and expect to be totally out of commission for 2 days and moderately unable to do stuff with your arms for 1-2 months.
i'm really glad there's a thread for this. i'm genderfluid and use it/its pronouns. i feel like most people on here wouldn't understand that? :')
Hey! I use It/Its pronouns often as well! No one seems to understand it, but im also ok with male or female pronouns for anyone who feels uncomfortable saying "it" to me
I had a day yesterday. Want to hear about it? For the most part it was filled with the joy-est of all joys.
Yesterday morning, my girlfriend was determined to come out to her neighbors. They share a driveway, and my gf is always going places as herself. However, she was quite nervous about going places as herself ever since they started sharing a driveway (they bought houses next to each other after having been neighbors already for years). The neighbors are like family friends. This new driveway situation was causing her to suddenly burst out crying at any given moment, and I was very concerned and would help her whenever she needed at those times.
But yesterday, she had me write out a letter to her neighbors because my handwriting is neat and according to her, her handwriting is like a "drunken five year old's". I tried my very best, and we attached the letter to a tupperware of brownies we had made. That's when things got real-real, and she freaked. I was like, "hey, let's drop this off before your therapy appointment" but she drove right past their house, lol, saying they "were not home" and I smiled and said "that's okay". Because it was.
We discussed when to drop off the note and brownies, and we spent all day out doing things, avoiding the situation at hand. I get why, totally. Finally, after a nice and calming date at a Mexican restaurant with live music, I held the note up and said "we're gonna do this" and she freaked again of course and decided to drink like 8 shots of whiskey. I was like, "you ready?" and she giggled and was "yup, liquid courage. No fear". But I still had to practically drag her by the hand to her neighbors' house (literally, I dragged her by her hand as she gently and nervously protested).
What followed was us out in the shivering cold for 10 minutes with her backing away (still attached to my hand) and whispering, "I'm scared" amongst giggles and smiles. I eventually got her to ring the doorbell, but the neighbors were not home. So we wedged the brownies between their screen door and front door and walked home.
Five minutes later, we get a knock on our door and we answer it and lo and behold its the neighbors smiling gently at us. The first words out of their mouth was, "oh, don't be scared, we understand. We already suspected. We saw you with make-up before. We've got a friend who's son is going through this, too, so we know about this kind of stuff already. I bet that was really hard. Are you okay?"
I was like, all secretly, "yesssssss". So we had a nice chat where I came out also as myself and as my gf's boyfriend and they invited us over for Thanksgiving.
Later on, my gf kept whispering "thank you" to me very sweetly and I just told her "any time you need it, love".
However also later on, the neighbors sent her a text about me, saying they hadn't expected a girl to have such bad handwriting and didn't know I was a boy when they saw me and they saw "a girl" (meaning me) and they used the feminine spelling of my name, "Bobbie" instead of "Bobby". This caused me to freak out. I'm so so glad they accept her, they even corrected themselves when they said "he" to her by mistake, but could they be a little sexist in accepting me? I don't know. The text was apologetic in tone, so I hope this is going to resolve itself.
Because of the text I freaked out, as I said, crying and hugging my girlfriend about how I betted if I didn't have these boobs I wouldn't be clocked as female so bad, how surgeons have treated me as 100% female even with their experience with trans men, all that. How I bet people think I'm hyper-female somehow, a form of discrimination, because my breasts are so huge. I don't know, really. But I do know that my boobs trigger most of my trans-related depression, and its gotta stop. So my girlfriend said we're in this together, and we're going to somehow get the money for my surgery and I said it would take me ten years to get the money with my income and I can't save more than $2000 on disability without it being taken away, and I can't take it for ten more years living like this, not living, all that. So she said the most incredible thing, which is "I'll sign the medical loan, I don't care, I'll do whatever it takes". I like those words, but will it happen? I don't doubt her of course, but my depression makes me doubtful that I'll ever get to live my life.
But today I may be going to a transgender day of remembrance service at a very lgbt-progressive church and I think there is also a dedication at the transgender memorial garden here in St Louis. It depends on if my girlfriend is too tired from work or not, as its right after she gets home from work. I'll let you know if we go and what happened, if you want to know.
You and your girlfriend are so cute together. I think the neighbors will know better now about using the right pronouns, I hope it works out!! emotion_hug Feel better soon.
My chest is really the only thing that gives me dysphoria these days. I used to not mind it, but being misgendered and hearing really ignorant statements, especially from close friends has really started to affect me. I really hate it. I'm not considering surgery because that's money and I don't ever plan on coming out to my family, though I can probably lie about it when I'm older, snorts. It's still difficult though. The other day my friend offered me a free binder, so I hope it makes the difference. Annnd I hope my chest stops growing sobs.
Aww, thank you. Its already a little better due to the kind support of you and others (:
Sorry to hear about your dysphoria. I don't get why people say ignorant statements because they see boobs and assume female. Well, I do, because its cis-normative, but still...if they know you're trans they should be more careful. I do hope that binder helps! I'm not sure what you can do to make your chest stop growing. I'm 29 years old and mine is still growing. It really sucks.
Hello, my name's Jennifer. I'm new here. Bobby (MarigoldMari) forced me to join biggrin I'm his girlfriend (I am! It's true!) I'm a trans girl. I've been on hormones for 4 months. I'm here to help biggrin
(I like the Little Mermaid and duckies)
Bobby: "Do you want to put how old you are?"
Jenni: "...No biggrin :: licks his arm:: "
I am the stereotypical trans-y type girl.
Bobby: "What makes you a stereotypical trans girl?"
Jenni: "...I am biggrin "
Jenni likes fashions. Purses. Shoes. Really like shoes.
Jenni: "Tell Jennis about Jennis."
Bobby: "You're really sweet. Really kind. You like to drink soda."
Jenni: *Laughs and puts head on his shoulder*
Bobby: "I thinks that's good."
Jenni: *nods vigorously from his shoulder and kisses his arm*
Is it ok to point out a (possibke) typo on the front page?
Anyway
Yey new thread
Our postal workers or what ever are on strike for about a week (or more if they can't reach an agreement about the wages) so no post is delivered right when I'm waiting for a letter that includes a paper with which I can go change my official name. It's funny how I now get impatient about maybe having to wait a week or so longer after having waited for this for years, lol.
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