This is me venting. Idk if any one will respond but uhg.
Im really upset and frustrated. I give relationships my all. And I work really hard on being a good gf and basically this guy I'm dating( ..was...is...not?) for about a year I broke up with him. I told him he didn't treat me correctly, he didn't try to spend time with me. Refuses to come to my apartment at all, and whenever we hang it has to be on his terms. Its always at his place, with his guy friends/band (which i fine they are my friends too) but he doesn't and REFUSES to try to spend time with me alone. "alone" is after hanging out till 4 am with everyone and they leave we go upstairs and go to sleep. He doesn't "court" me like you do when you date. We've never been out on a date and Im super low maintenance. Like just having a movie night or playing video games together or going and getting coffee or going for a drive! Just something to hang out with one another for a little. It doesn't even have to be a whole day. Like just...30 min. Seriously..
Anyways.. I broke up with him.(He had considered breaking up with me at one point but decided dating a year wasn't worth throwing away just for being single) Told him what I wanted and he said "Im better single anyways" and "I can't do that" and stuff. The band and other things are his priority. Thats ok. But....there isn't even a difference between me and the boys...there has to be a little bit of a difference you know?
It was a mutual break we said its ok we will be friends he said "love you" and we hugged and left.
I didn't text him. He asked if I got my stuff and I didn't respond. Changed my relationship status (i know dumb but it was a finality thing) and cried and went through grieving.
The next day I got these messages:
"Can I text u?"
" : ( "
"I wanna tell u something"
so I responded and said that he was allowed to talk to me but I needed some time after everything.
I asked "what do you want to tell me"
"That I don't think we made the right choice".
so we made an agreement.
He didn't want to throw a relationship with an "amazing girl like" me when he knows "you're the best ill ever have and I love you". so we are 'together' but taking time to go slow and stuff.
And now today he said
"I need time to think about stuff and make sure we made the right choice".
I told him i broke up with him because he didn't have enough respect for me as a romantic interest and he wasn't sure what he wanted so I needed to be happy. He didn't want me with him if i wasn't happy. But he wanted me. Now he can't make up his mind again. He's hot and cold and Im exhausted with being hurt.....
what the hell do I do....
For now I'm just focusing on school and myself and just not talking to him. But...like....Idk I'm sad. Confused. And really don't feel like being led on...
Distance yourself if you're not going to break it off completely Carrottt o:
That way in the case that you do, it won't hurt you as much. In the case that you don't - at least you're relying on yourself for your own happiness and not thinking about him as much. ^_^
Distance yourself if you're not going to break it off completely Carrottt o:
That way in the case that you do, it won't hurt you as much. In the case that you don't - at least you're relying on yourself for your own happiness and not thinking about him as much. ^_^
yeah.. Im trying to figure out how to do that :/ Its a mess. Just wish he knew what he wanted cause it doesn't eem like he does
I feel like this is a you don't know what you have until it's gone situation.
Just let him be, as mistybluesky said: "Distance yourself" It can be hard, but it's needed to patch wounds. The what 'he' wants situation is a bit selfish and for a good relationship you both have to think about each other AS well as yourself.
Just break it off completely. Obviously he doesn't know what he wants, and has his own priorities other than you, so why would you deal with a guy like that and waste your own time? There are people out there who are willing to have a committed relationship. Willing to spend time together, care for each other, have intimacy and whatever else comes in a loving relationship.
Don't emotionally exhaust yourself with someone who can't put you first, or at least sometimes put you first in their priority list. Move on.
He doesn't seem emotionally invested.
It's to my understanding that people NEED that.
I am not one of those people so him not being there would be PERFECT for me.
But for you, you need a less...detached relationshit.
Get rid of him.
Find someone who can give you what you want/deserve.
He doesn't seem emotionally invested.
It's to my understanding that people NEED that.
I am not one of those people so him not being there would be PERFECT for me.
But for you, you need a less...detached relationshit.
Get rid of him.
Find someone who can give you what you want/deserve.
Its not so much the emotional detachment I understand him and he understands me well I just idk youre probably right I feel like he honestly just cant make up his mind nor does he care too. He never fights for it. and I broke up with him and was like "eh k whateva"
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