having a baby?!

reasons to have a baby

because I want to rope in the man	8.0%	[ 4 ]
I need the money from the government	4.0%	[ 2 ]
it was a complete accident, but a good one :D	20.0%	[ 10 ]
because I'm ready to be a parent	68.0%	[ 34 ]
Total Votes:			[ 50 ]

[Parallel 5ths mule]

What is it with the youth these days?! gonk

I was at a new job this last summer and every one there was completely befuddled that I had made it to 20 without having a child, as if that's weird or something.

I was up in the break room one time talking to a coworker about some money issues and affording school and he said that because I wasn't married yet at the time I should have a baby with my fiancee so I can get money from the government. As if babies don't cost a boat load of money. stressed

Now, lately, I was talking to a new neighbor and she just couldn't get over the fact that at my age, I was married and didn't have a child. Because, you know, people don't marry any more for love, they just marry their baby's daddy.

What the hell, Gaia?! Why is it all of a sudden weird to be responsible? How come people think that having a baby is just going to make all the problems go away? These aren't even "ghetto" people. They're just normal people who came from good homes, had good grades in high school, went/go to college, you know, typical American folks. Why am I the strange one for actually having a plan for my life?!

Edit: this is not a flame on those who accidentally get pregnant, decide to keep the baby, and become great parents. this is a flame on those who intentionally have a baby for stupid reasons.

[Tsuki no Sil]

I'm the same way as you; though I'm not 20; I'd never marry/have children to 'rope in the man' or a silly reason like that. o-o; I'll marry when I'm ready to, after I carry out the plans I have for my life.

I agree though, since the 'times have changed'... I don't know, I guess it shows how shallow most people are.

[daughtersatine]

I'm 18 and I know how you feel. I've been surrounded by people getting married and/or having a baby. And they are about my age. It's freaky. O_O

[Viva La Juicy]

I got pregnant at 19... My son was born January 14th 2006. I finished college and I have a great job. I won't marry my son's father even though were were engaged at the time I was pregnant. I am the only one in my neighborhood that is 22 with a son and not married... So I don't agree with you that it's normal for people my age to have children. Yes alot more people are getting pregnant these days. People do need to be responsible and make sure they can take care of themselves or else give the baby up for adoption.

[Xiphium Iris]

Uhh...that guy's screwed up. Seriously. No one should ever have a baby for anything other than the desire to be a good parent and raise a beautiful child. I couldn't imagine how awful it would be to be told that my only purpose was to cheat the government out of some money. How ridiculous.

Maybe you're just hanging around with the wrong people. Ever seen the movie "Idiocracy"? It makes a good point. I'd rather wait 'til I'm thirty than push one out at eighteen, any day. Hell, I'm not even sure I want a child. I'd be an awful mother xD At any rate, don't follow the crowd; do what's right for you. You're much wiser for it.

[Parallel 5ths mule]

Unsweetened Honey

Uhh...that guy's screwed up. Seriously. No one should ever have a baby for anything other than the desire to be a good parent and raise a beautiful child. I couldn't imagine how awful it would be to be told that my only purpose was to cheat the government out of some money. How ridiculous.

Maybe you're just hanging around with the wrong people. Ever seen the movie "Idiocracy"? It makes a good point. I'd rather wait 'til I'm thirty than push one out at eighteen, any day. Hell, I'm not even sure I want a child. I'd be an awful mother xD At any rate, don't follow the crowd; do what's right for you. You're much wiser for it.

haha, unfortunately I don't get to choose my coworkers (I'm not at that job any more though) or my neighbors. xp These people aren't real friends that a criticizing me for not being a mother yet, more like acquaintances. And it's more they're reaction to the fact that I'm married and without child rather than them pushing me to have a child, except for that one kid. Needless to say, I pretty much stopped talking to him after that one conversation. I just don't understand the mindset of these people. stressed

[Nitemare Nymphetamine]

I chose the second to last, because she was an accident, but ironically a good accident because my life was going to s**t and now I have someone to care about and think about instead of always focusing on the bad things.

I don't exactly know what you mean, the only person I've heard say something like that was my mum's uncle. It was funny - well, ironic - that he had called right before I came home from NY and talked to my mum, asking her if I had a baby. My mum said of course not, she 18, to which her uncle replied something like, 'girl, that's old to be having a baby in the hood, s**t!' And a bit after that I told her I was pregnant.

I don't live in the ghetto, but I actually thought people who lived in more ghetto areas were more accustomed to seeing teen pregnancy than people who didn't. That is odd, I would think women who were more career-oriented would want to have a child more towards late 20's, because that's said to be the healthiest time to have a baby.

[Antigone_Thebes]

i'm shocked that you are 20 and married, i can't imagine getting married within the next two years of my life. i think it's extremely responsible of you not to have a child if you aren't ready.

[Koji_magyar]

emocourt

i'm shocked that you are 20 and married, i can't imagine getting married within the next two years of my life. i think it's extremely responsible of you not to have a child if you aren't ready.

well once you think about it, marriage only means you're legally "planning on staying together for an extended period of time"

[kuya like whoa]

Ive been a mother since I was 13
:/
Gave birth to my son a month before my 14th birthday.

[SilverAzrael]

[Koji_magyar]

SilverAzrael

rofl rofl rofl rofl gotta love psycho mormons
(note: I was raised LDS so I have every right to make fun of them)

[Lebiram]

Yeah people here are like that too
But thats only because I'm Mexican,19
and i have no kids I'm proud of myself for that biggrin
People who use their kids for money have serious issues
(i had a friend who's mom admitted that she only had her for $ )
Now she's 16 Pregnant and her moms a bum neutral

[soy un perdador]

I blame Maury.

[aerialmelodies]

Get pregnant when you're already engaged?? I've heard of people doing it to get married, but you're already at that step. It's a dumb reason and the fact your coworkers were encouraging it makes no sense. I certainly hope they were joking!

If you plan on being child-free your whole life (like I do)... expect to get a lot of flack for it. People expect you to breed, and when you say you have no intentions on doing it because of various lifestyle choices, they just reply with "You'll change your mind." Maybe I will, but most likely I won't. I certainly wouldn't because someone else told me to. Ugh.