So... I slapped my Grandma

[Oblivionic]

One has the right to defend oneself, no matter the other parties involved. Personally, I'd have gone off after the first slap. I stopped tolerating physical abuse at 14. Parent, sibling, stranger, it doesn't matter. If I'm struck, I will strike back. Only if the person is significantly weaker than myself do I give a warning (along the lines of "do it again, and I will take you down" ).

If your mother tolerates abuse, then tell her to take your place the next time your grandmother goes nuts again.

Also, I feel like I'm in LI right now.... ninja

[diamond Domonique]

That escalated quickly. You had a right to defend yourself though. It doesn't matter how old they are, if they are injuring you then self defense is necessary.

[diamond Domonique]

thatonechick101

So you're going to b***h about your grandmother being upset while youre living with her. MOVE OUT THEN! Obviously you can't afford to, so show a little gratitude for having some deal with such a bitchy granddaughter. I would never disrespect my grandmother in that way. Even if she hit me, she's my grandmother and I would never purposefully hurt her.

Move out or show respect.

So if you were in their position and your grandma beat on you, you would show respect by not defending yourself and let her continue? That's incredibly stupid, not to mention it's pathetic self worth. I suppose you would let her kill you as well? To show "respect" for someone who clearly hasn't shown you any.

[Tee the Wicked]

thatonechick101

So you're going to b***h about your grandmother being upset while youre living with her. MOVE OUT THEN! Obviously you can't afford to, so show a little gratitude for having some deal with such a bitchy granddaughter. I would never disrespect my grandmother in that way. Even if she hit me, she's my grandmother and I would never purposefully hurt her.

Move out or show respect.

You. Are. A. ********. Moron.

It's bad enough all the incorrect assumptions you made here, but even worse, is that, in a sense, you are condoning child abuse and domestic violence, as well as victim-blaming. evil

[Broken Tart]

To be honest I don't know what I would do in your situation because I cannot imagine my grandma ever being violent with me...
I guess I would just not bother arguing with her in the first place.

I wouldn't say you're wrong but I would never want to get physical with anyone so... Hm.
Try to avoid arguing with her if she gets like that.

[Baby Neamhain]

Broken Tart

To be honest I don't know what I would do in your situation because I cannot imagine my grandma ever being violent with me...
I guess I would just not bother arguing with her in the first place.

I wouldn't say you're wrong but I would never want to get physical with anyone so... Hm.
Try to avoid arguing with her if she gets like that.

OP has stated he does not like fighting and retreated to his room. She barged in. So he was already trying to avoid arguing with her. 3nodding



I've only had one grandma hit me, but that was when I was around 4. I don't know how I'd react to an old person smacking the s**t out of me now, but I'd probably just scream really loud to attract attention and take cover with my arms because I really don't want to push and accidentally cause an old person to break their hip or something. If an adult, per say an auntie, slapped me around like that for no reason though, I'd prob end up clawing and flailing the s**t out of their face. scream slap me once, okay, slap me 93847247 time nO!

[Hamartomania]

Forum can't make decision for you OP, but if it was me, I would not take crap like that from anyone, not even my grandmother. It's admirable you show much more patience and respect towards people around you than your grandma, but think of yourself and your well being too. You do not have to endure it if really gets unreasonable.

I've had difficult relationship with my grandma for years too, and I'd like to share my story. It may not be similar to OP's story, but my point is there is no reason to respect elder if they cannot act like someone who deserves respect. I'm trying to keep this as short as possible.

I was too young to understand the situation entirely when this downward spiral began, but I guess it all began when my parents bought our old family farm from my father's parents. I was about 4 years old at that time. What I've been told is that it became quickly clear that my paternal grandparents, who lived right next to old farm my agriculturist parent were trying to revive and renovate, had absolutely arrogant and disrespectful attitude towards my mother. That started to bit by bit damage their relationship with my father, and they harassed my mother over years so that she became depressed. All that s**t was obviously kept from me and my younger sisters until the summer when I was 10 years old. Mother packed me and my sisters in car, and we moved to some ecovillage far from our home and we stayed there for few months until we were called back to home with shocking news of my paternal grandfathers suicide. Our family was reunited again and next winter was somewhat uneventful, until the next spring came and mom told us that she was gonna leave for month long vacation to other country. She left for month, came back after three and told me and my sisters she would soon leave again and not come back. It took four years until father started to use word divorce. After the death my grandfather and my mother leaving, my grandma started drinking. When I was 13 I inherited the malice my grandparents had held towards my mother while helping my drunk and passed out grandmother back inside the house, while she tried to slap me and called me and my grandma tried to slap me while drunk calling me "whore" and "daughter of a b***h". Similar situations and name calling happened occasionally until I moved from home, and I'm just very happy and relieved she never attacked my younger sisters like she did attack me.

Only once grandmother apologized me, and I told her I forgive her if she promises never to drink again. Obviously she did not keep her promise, and it pains me that she continues to act like s**t towards my step-mother. I'm currently 23 and I see my grandmother about 2 times a year. She generally acts like no yelling and harassment had never happened, so we never talk about it. I act polite towards her, but I do not consider us to be very close. The only time when I remember fighting with her while she wasn't drunk was when I was still teenager. She yelled at me about my "lack of respect towards elders". I told her to go fly a ******** kite if she cannot act like respectable person, because I'm not gonna bow down to any numbers.

It was a little harsh thing to say, but it is one experience of mine which taught me that there is idiots everywhere (in all age groups) and age or kinship is just not good reason to put up with even the most vile s**t.

[Grace Gubreez]

The minute she started hitting you, you had permission to strike back.

And your mom should know how your grandma is by now, it was wrong of her to side with her.

also I suggest not EVER mentioning anything to your grandmother.