This is me.
Bri. 19. I'm trying my best.
I cannot and will not be fixed. I just sort of fell back, waiting for my life to change in its ever-unsatisfactory ways. I strive for perfection, but I’m falling apart. I can never and will never exceed my own expectations. I am in college, I work, and that’s it. I don’t have time to try and like people. As a matter of fact, I don’t want to like people anymore. I hate all walks of life. I have seen the lowest of the low, most sickening brand of organism possible. No one can convince me otherwise. The people already in my life right now are good enough for me. No need for fillers or replacements. I have terrible ADD. I have too much anxiety to get adderol. And I have too much anxiety for anxiety medication. I am a wreck, ugly, and pathetic. I am a weak individual. I am too reliant on the few people that I do have around me to try anything new. I am emotionally unstable and emotionally dependent. My greatest hope is stability. I want nothing more than a thriving career in horticulture and a bachelor’s degree. I am very materialistic, simply because I find material items comforting. I love shopping for random odds and ends, even if I don’t need them. It makes me feel good to find something that I feel I could use one day. I have an unhealthy relationship with the thrift store and plants. I buy too much s**t from there and I come home with so many plants that I cannot fit them in my tiny apartment. My cat is my ultimate purpose of life. I don’t know what I would do without her. It’s kind of weird..i Know. I am already that crazy cat lady that people give weird looks to. I love coffee, caffiene, and tea. I also have an addictive personality. I am bad at spelling… I hate math and numbers. I also hate science and anything biology and chemistry related. I love all things beautiful in nature and literature. I am a girlie girl. I love makeup, hair stuff, clothes, and jewelry. Ask me any sort of beauty advice. I hate movies because I don’t have the attention span for them. I am stupid and slow, so I always ruin movies by asking too many questions. I’m also very deaf, so subtitles are mostly mandatory. I love cartoons and animation. But I hate anime, roleplaying, cosplaying, anything along that sort. I guess I don’t understand it, but it mostly irritates me. I get irritated easily.
Don’t ask me how my day went, it most likely was terrible. If I have something good to say, I most likely will say it without being asked. I am pretty complainy. Mostly because I have the worst luck ever and 75% of my life is spent being confused about something. I am terrible at parking. I know nothing about cars. I know more about plants than you could put your money on. Its my only passion in the world, so sorry if i’m annoying about it. I have only a few expectations. Don’t piss me off. Don’t expect me to fulfill your responsibilities. Don’t force me to answer questions I dont want to answer. Don’t automatically come at me with anger. Don’t over-criticize me. Don’t tell me what to do. Don’t ask me to sit down and watch a movie with you unless I am the first to suggest it. Don’t ask me to tell a story, I will always give you the too-long, descriptive and detailed version
~Stalk my Life Via Tumblr
Ma Vie, Dans Les Mots. [My life, in words]
You know that feeling that you get when you think something is going to happen? Something important, but you dont now when? Thats how my life is. And something did happen. To describe it in one word is beyond me. There are so many adjectives that co