Sorry... My best friendship tragically ended in 2012 or early 2013... We had lots of issues, actually no I HAD lots of issues. She was the strongest, and more mature women i ever met. She dealt with my cursed personality issues like a saint. But issues over struggling with a possible borderline personality disorder made things pretty bad for me too. I was very sad, emotional and reckless because at the time i was severely depressed and suicidal as she came over to England this one time. It really didn't work out... and I recklessly deleted her, because after seeing what happened i could only see it one way.not the other way, not that she was busy or anything etc. But that it was all just a big hate tactic to ******** me over somehow, and that belief made me feel like i had to delete. which was the ending of the best friend I've ever had in my life, who's helped me through SO much in the past and still liked the parts she saw of me that weren't maimed by whatever the trauma i was experiencing. I wish I could message her and tell her how sorry I am, and how much I've changed and matured over many negative experiences, each one grows me stronger, and now after having a major on I can go outside and deal with people as though they were just there. people doing their own s**t, i only get anxious and adrenalised now if there's shady people around or they're talking laughably about kicking peoples asses and breaking bones. then i rightly become stressed. but that's it, I'm no longer a prisoner in this mind of mine. I can walk down a street and look competently confident, cool and incognito. I wish we just met now instead of back then.. but more than that I wish we could talk and see if this friendship was ever worth picking back up? Despite so much change i know back then would have made you very happy to hear. And I feel we'd get along a LOT better than we have before. and i'd like to prove that to you, or at least hear if this is completely dead?
Hey for whenever you get on this, Gaia deletes unread messages after about a month, it's stupid because I actually sometimes messaged you other important s**t or general stuff so I didn't have to spam you, but now if Gaia keeps on ******** up you might not have any of them >_> just a note, even though I'm shy about comments it's the only thing that doesn't get deleted as far as I know
I won't spam you anymore, but you did say feel free, so I did, but there's no reason behind it rather then to screw up your profile comment space, so i won't do it anymore, if you want to spam me to make up for it, go ahead.