hello, people on here usually call me "pulse" i guess because of my username, i am bi-polar. i get pissed off easily espicially at certain things. like disrespecting my "friends". *sigh* i dont even know who my friends are anymore... i mostly have chick friends. i like meeting new people. i can be(or in other words i usally am) pretty damn emotional. i am very suicidal. i find that there is no point in living except for the ones that love you. i take things very seriously so unless i know that you like to joke, dont joke with me i'll take it seriously. the only joy i have in life left is poetry, my gf or a good final fantasy game. i LOVE watching final fantasy or playing the games. THEY KICK a**!!! for some reason alot of people call me "emo" but i dont see why, although i guess it could be because of how emotional i can get if you catch me at teh right moment. but hey it only shows that im soft sensitive and caring. so i got no reason to complain.... or do i???? oh for those of you who give a damn i dont believe in this so called "god" or any religion for that mattter, and i take this BEYOND athieism......its much more like nihilism... i got very few friends left.... im not even sure who must of them are... i only have 1 REAL good friend thats local(Daniel, or in other words my best friend) and 1 maybe 2 people thats kind of a friend thats local. but we dont get the chance to talk much... but all of my other friends are on here. and i dunno why but i HATE the sound of my own damned voice. but y'know, its like i have no family left.... my mom(Lisa) doesnt care about me worth ********. my dad(Randy) just pisses me off by doing nothing else but calling women sex toys or he beats the s**t out of me for no damn reason... my lil brother(Daniel) runs away at the site of me. my big brother(Jason) is ******** retarded and has to have his way or else he'd kill somebody(thats a figure of speech, hes too much of a p***y to even hurt someone without feeling bad about it)... and my oldest brother(Matthew) is never at home hes always with his wife(Bethany) and she hates matts family. i love death note. the anime is awesome... but the movie's were so ******** better the the anime. its no competition the movies were actually filmed and not drawn. but the anime still kicks so much a** its not funny... and most people say im not very funny, but i try to make people laugh and smile anyways, i would, but its too late for me... now instead of smile i sigh and instead of laugh i cry(thats another figure of speech)... life has always brought me down and i dont know what to do anymore... but keep reading and you'll find out more about me little by little, and theres some stuff that im not posting on my profile... so just try to get to know me if you want to find out more, i am very open.... except when it comes to my own emotions.... ummm.... i got a girl friend...(we just hooked back up together March 22, at 12:03 P.M) her name is Tia... heh.... shes the best thing that ever happend to me... i love her so much... we've been through a bunch of s**t together.... if she were to die i'd probally go with her... i cant see my life without her.... not again.... *sigh* i just wish there was some way i could tell her EXACTLY how i feel... but i could go on for an eternity trying to tell her how i feel and i still wouldnt had told her a fraction of it.... i just... want to be with her, to hold her hand, to hold her in my arms, to cuddle with her, to kiss her, to hug her.... heh... this next part isnt about Tia... but still... im pansexual(pansexual=that you want or are ready for a romantic relationship no matter what the gender or biological sex) you got a problem with that suck my d**k....
peace is but a shadow of death, despreate to forget its painful past... though we hope for promising years after shedding a thousand tears, yesterdays sorrow constantly nears, and while the moon still shines blue, by dawn it will turn to scarlet hue.