THE QUOTES OF COMPLETE AND UTTER AWESOME!
"Well Screw You! Wait! I can't! I'm gay!--no wait. we're both girls.--nevermind! I'm not gay!" ~Turtle (Roommate)
Turtle: Why do guys always come when you're not trying to be attractive?
Me: ....I'm currently trying to decide on the definition of "come" in that sentence...o.o
Turtle: Everything's faster with boys...wait. that sounds dirty
Morgan: You sneezed three times! You're pregnet!
Me: Aw crap. Who's is it this time?
Me: Breast Cancer's the best! They've got pink stuff!
Morgan: Thats's one angry pikachu
Me: He's PMSing.
Heather: I'll just tell him to hug the girl who's been stalking him for the last two weeks
Me: I may come in my pants OwO
Turtle: BABIES BABIES BABIES!!!
Morgan: *eating a hamburger*
Me: YOU'RE EATING MY BABIES!!
Morgan: Yes. Yes I am.
Me: That's okay, I eat human babies.
Me: You didn't like that last one and said Pikachu was an idiot >x<
Jay: Don't worry, Pikachu doesn't care what I think.
Me: Yes he does! Because Pikachu's a good boy.
Jay: Man. They got you bad, didn't they?
Me: Mm-hmm! Mm-hmm! OwO PikaPikaf*ckinchu!
Me: I had a dream I was a doctor on scrubs,and I killed Satoshi from DNAngel...what's for breakfast?
Turtle: Don't ever compare your bacon to somebody else's bacon!
Turtle: Just cause you've got beef with my roommate, doesn't mean you can slather your A1 sauce all over me! ...I taste like cold pizza
Turtle:*singing* Why can't you sneeze, whenever I talk about you
Ralphie: I've got a question
Turtle: I'm not pregnant! I told you! You can't do that with a hand!
Me: ...What's an incubus?
Heather: It's a male succubus.
Me: oh!.... :3....what's a succubus?
Joanna: What ARE you reading?
Gloria: He was called "Warrior Pope"
Me: SUPER OMEGA WARRIOR POPE!
Me: He's a champion level digimon ^^
Me: I think Lancia and I should adopt lambo and get married
Me: Then, I'll have an affair with Shou-chan and another mafia war will break out. YAY MAFIA WARS!
"Mori Like Seashells." ~ Ouran host Club English bloopers
"My mom had a uterus. I lived in it."~ JD from Scrubs
Me: THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO FALL IN MAN LOVE AND GET MAN MARRIED AND HAVE MAN BABIES!
Saku: because they couldn't have normal babies...
Me: Of course not! Trying to squeeze a baby out of a p***s would be deathly painful!
Reborn: Bianchi's my lover
Morgan: WOT?! He's as big as her v****a! He could put his entire body in there,kick around a little bit, and she'd have a orgasm!
Me: I'MMA EAT YER BABIES! STRAIGHT OUTTA YER OVARIES!
Turtle: EEERGH! The verticals aren't even like, vertical!
Turtle: Are you sure you're not sick?
Me: well, my head doesn't hurt and my nose isn't running, so i don't think i have a cold. .... either that or i'm an idiot
Turtle: The things he does with his hands: GAY PEOPLE DO THINGS WITH THEIR HANDS!
Turtle: Me and my friend are talking about penises! biggrin
Turtle: Don't talk about cars! Orlando is my sexy beast that I like to honk!!
Me: Are we still talking about cars...?
turtle: There's enough bacteria on these dishes to substitute marijuana for the usage of medical purposes.
Dex: Kitty.. the... *bleep*ing insane pokemon.
There is only one Kitty in existence, and little is known about it. All scientific research on this pokemon were halted in a freak lab accident. All current pokemon Professors refuse to study it's habits for they obtain temporary insanity, a variety of mental illnesses, and a 'kawaii' overdose. Three out of four scientist resorted to suicide to, as they quoted, "make it stop"
No trainer has ever had the courage to catch one... until you threw that ball, you dumbass..
Oz: So what's it like being surrounded by a couple of black guys?
Turtle: You're black! I'm white! Let's make a turner classic movie together!!
Allison: I gotta pee like a pregnant woman!
Turtle: My favorite animals the playpus.
Me: The platypus is what happens when god sneezes. He's like "I'll put a duck here and a beaver here and--ACCHOO!!! -splut- aw crud..."
Turtle: I'm gonna need to get a job before i have sex...
Margy: Saphy says she'd sell her deathnote manga for Loveless
Me: I don't blame her! Catboys SO beat God!
Me: *holding pikachu keychain into the light*
Turtle: What are you doing?
Me: I'm really bored, so I'm looking into the hole in my pikachu's butt
Turtle: YOU REALLY ARE
A CHILD MOLESTER!!
(do u see the connection??)
Mama: Tough titties! You're stuck!
Margy: it's like talking to a wall!
Me: Yes! My brain is like a wall to your face
Me: yes pika, dig ur face into my crotch =.=
(in this case, pikachu is a cat, and my crotch is a pillow, just to clear up any misinterpretations)
Kate: this is where sexual abuse starts
Me: oh gawd! I hope I have ugly children.
Ein (dog): *trying to lick Pikachu's (cat) scab*
Me: Ein! Quit it! Pika can lick him own boobies--wat! I mean boo-boos xDD
Me: I have my flashlight, but every step I take, i stop, and listen. Listen for some EVIL RAPIST SQUIRREL!
Mom and will: xDD lol
Me: They're out there! all like "This week, we take a break from Turtle's crazy life
, for a special episode of her roommate Kitty's Crazy life!
" With their little squirrely cameras, making their little squirrely reality shows
Turtle: *steps on matt's CD case*
Matt: YOU b***h! You got mud all over my CDs!
Turte: You a*****e! D< I got tissues <3
Me: *listening to iTunes*
Turtle: You listen to christmas music?
Me: What are you talkin' bout? This is from The Lion King!
Me: *fase-translating 8059 doujin**narrating as yama* As I stood there, i felt helpless, watching him defencelessly play his piano--mmmm defenceless gokudera >9--no wait! angsty doujin! SRS FACE!
Me: I just pooped so much i feel anemic...
Me: Lookit mah new Lambo figurine! *cell phone pic*
Mogan: You need to let me come over so I can rape him
Me: He's two inches tall, how are you gonna rape him?
Me: Someone in gamestop thought margy was a mother, she went to pick up her pokemon game that came with a free toy and the guy was like 'do you have any kids at home? would you like another?'
Me: so she got another pokemon for me :3
Turtle:Oh! Pokemon! I thought you were talking about children. "Do you have children at home? would you like another child?"
Me: xDDDDD "we're giving free children away with our games. would you like another?" xDDDClick here to feed me a Rare Candy!Get your own at Pokeplushies!Click here to feed me a Rare Candy!Get your own at Pokeplushies!
WOT? PRON? WHERE?
MOEMON CARD! PM me if you want one ^^