In a Nut Shell

My name is Samantha
I live in Canada
I'm Russian-Privet!
I'm a vegetarian
I'm going to school to become an English Professor
I'm a hippy
I believe Abortion is moral
I believe killing animals is immoral
I believe in literacy
I believe in irony
I like strawberries and chocolate
I am sexually active, but I am not a slut
My Grandmother is a sexologist
She tried to give me a d***o for my 13th birthday
My mom is a Paramedic and a Fire fighter...she is also sexy
My dad owns his own business...he's rich
I'm poor
I'm a daddys girl, no doubt
I have a boyfriend, he is smexy
I love 4th and Vine because they have amazing wine and the waiter has a nice wiggle
My bestest friend is a homosexual
My other bestest friend is not a homosexual
I love the movie Borat and Forty year old virgin
I love books and reading
My favourite book is Life of Pi
I'm a communist at heart
I don't really understand communism
Seriously

I'm mean
Really mean
I will say whatever I want to say and I will not apologize
I hate fat...not fat people, but fat
I wish I could be anorexic, but I love food
I believe in God
I hate religion
I hate weekdays
I hate most people
I hate watching TV
But I love TV shows
Like Girls Next Door
and LOST
and Family Guy
and anything that has nudity

I love cats
and dogs
and ferrets
I have a cat named Max
He talks to me all the time
and sleeps on my shoulder like a baby
He eats my plants
and eats better food than I do

I live in an apartment
that smells like mold
even though I clean it everyday

I'm boring

The end