Welcome to my profile. Won’t you stay and read?

There have been dozens of drafts, and upwards of seven installations of my about me’s. I feel that people enjoy reading these, and I’ve gotten quite a few compliments on them. Don’t let that stop you from complimenting them, as that definitely helps me write more.

One fish, two fish.
Red fish, blue fish.
This fish, that fish.
I hate you fish.
Hop on pop
My heart will stop.
Three fish, four fish.
******** tool fish.
And welcome to the aperture sc
Whoops, wrong window.
My name is Amythe.
My real name is Christopher.
Call me what you like, but know that I am a boy.
Please refrain from calling me Amy.
Also, don’t call me Amy with satire.
It’s really not funny.
Please, Amy is not a boy’s name.
At least, not yet.
That’s not until I have kids.
This little piggy went to market
And came home to a llama, a match book, and a television that.
None of them were there before.
You must light the match book to set fire to the llama.
But you need the llama to change the channel on the television.
But you need the television to strike the match book against.
Solve for X.
I joined Gaia in September of 2004.
The 24th of that month.
Six years I’ve been on this site.
And every year it just gets a little worse and worse.
Sure, I’ve taken breaks.
Who hasn’t?
But that’s still terrible.
That not-so-cool fish.
Sometimes I reuse parts of my old About Me’s
This following part is one of those.
My favorite bands are Joanna Newsom and Agalloch.
My favorite song is by Battle of Mice.
My favorite genre of music is post-rock.
My favorite author is Chuck Palahniuk.
My favorite book is Diary.
My favorite movie is The Tracey Fragments
My favorite artfilm is Waking Life.
My favorite drug film is Spun.
Copying and pasting doesn’t fulfill me.
I really hate that small little spew fish.
I’m rather destructive.
I drive a motorcycle.
I practice parkour
I hardly eat, and I slice my wrist.
Help me from myself, Mr. blood pool fish.
I’ve been banned more times than most should ever be.
I was a complete douchebag music elitist for three years.
Then I was a smaller, yet still significant, douchebag in the LD.
Sorry, everyone.
I’ll be more tame.
Like a lion, with a chair being shoved in my face.
I am in love with Netflix
But it just serves as a mean to soothe my addictions.
I get extremely addicted to things.
Anything, really. Projects.
And then it dies off after a couple of weeks.
And I never touch it again.
Je suis mauvais au français.
Mais j'essaie.
Cel’Il ne fait pas fish.
I love to tutor math
Teaching people is something that comes naturally to me.
It allows me to nurture
Because ******** nature.
********. Nature.
I love being purple.
Or Green, or Yellow, but I haven’t made those full-body dyes yet.
If you enjoy my about me, or any of my posts
Or maybe you just think I’m cute.
Do tip. heart
Also, drop me a line.
I really love talking to people
And if at all possible, send me a PM
My goal in life is to become famous.
I want to be talked about in college classrooms.
I know, one of these days, I’ll be cited in a book.
A Wikipedia will be written on me.
An entire Wikipedia.
And I won’t be in the goo fish.
I wish I could draw.
It’s really crushing to me that I can’t.
I feel like most things come very naturally to me.
But even after years of trying off and on.
I can’t be graced with the skills of an artist.
The eye, the hand.
You’re a ******** tool fish.
I ******** love animals.
And I love ******** animals
I had a puppy for 14 years before she passed away this past summer.
I’m distraught over that.
But at least I still have Boxxy, my tuxedo kitten.

And yes, she’s named after that Boxxy.
I’m ******** up fish
My medications make it so that I can’t write.
Can’t compose.
Can barely do math.
But without them, I can’t hear anyone speak.
Too many voices.
Too many ******** voices.
This is some of the worst prose I’ve written.
Thank the medications for this.
I miss the voices.
Too many ******** voices.
My About Me
Is a way to let loose.
To be myself.
To cry onto a page and let my fingers do the communicating.
I wish I could be coherent
I wish I could know what I want to say.
And although I might not be mentally well
At least physically, I’m fine.

For now.
I’ll ******** kill you fish.
I’ll ******** kill you.


Viewing 12 of 14 friends


My thoughts



Viewing 10 of 20 comments.

turbid blue

Report | 12/07/2012 10:48 pm

turbid blue

Oi get back.
Moonlight Agony

Report | 02/07/2012 1:43 am

Moonlight Agony

Damn it Chris get back on here I need someone to d**k around with.

Report | 04/01/2011 11:01 pm


D'aw thanks, you too <3
VVhy Naut

Report | 11/29/2010 10:21 am

VVhy Naut

You seem a lot more mature than before you disappeared. =] Just thought you should know.
Pleasure to read your posts now.
The Blanket Molester

Report | 11/29/2010 10:09 am

The Blanket Molester

Your About Me
Is ******** Beautiful.
I Wish I Could Write Like You Do.
******** You heart
With Love

Report | 11/27/2010 7:52 pm


I'd rather tell you via PM. I'm extremely paranoid and protective of my ideas, as anyone could copyright it and claim it as their own.
[ Tank Girl ]

Report | 11/27/2010 7:33 pm

[ Tank Girl ]

Major kudos to you for liking Joanna Newsom and Chuck Palahniuk.

Report | 11/27/2010 7:32 pm


Rather would do it all myself, and currently working on an idea. Pitching it to writing companies is going to be suckish, but if at first you do not succeed.. You're in good company. Stephen King's 'Carrie' was rejected at first, 16 publishers rejected publishing Anne Frank's diary, and even Harry Potter was rejected by a dozen publishers before being published. There are many more works that were first rejected, but later had their time to shine. My Muses help me, and then it will be up to Fate. She'll decide when the time is right for things to take off, and if.

Report | 11/27/2010 7:25 pm


Not many, which is why I was hoping to go back for an art degree after I get a masters in psychology. I'm confident in my ability to obtain a scholarship, and I'm willing to work my a** off for my dreams. They're not worth anything if I don't work for them, and if I'm not willing to work for them.. Why should I keep my dreams?

Some suggested art therapy.. Which is just as much bullshit to me as being something as pathetic as a professor. No pay, no life, no passion. I want to be able to make a living from my art and from my writings. The chances are unlikely, but I want to at least have a fallback if art doesn't take off for me. I'm willing to work, as I've said, but even hard work cannot always guarantee the best results.

Report | 11/27/2010 7:10 pm



So, so many people who have met me have told me that I would make a good teacher.. That I should consider teaching because of how I am. And, I've always told them, I'd rather pump gas for my entire life than teach. I could see myself being depressed and eventually offing myself due to the s**t pay, the constant unappreciation, the cries that fall on deaf ears, the miserable myriad of students that I'd have the displeasure of dealing with..

Long story short, I'd be exactly like Professor Snape.


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