AboutHow are you on this fine day?
I like to make friends and bother people on towns (sorry) with kim smile
Perverts... BE GONE... I DONT like you
My second account is: CreatorOfMyOwnLittleWorld
This is work of non-fiction written by me and my colleague, Kimberly. And should not be taken seriously. Enjoy.
(Remember to read in a westren accent.)
So there we were, me and Kim, just mindin’ our good ol’ business. We’s were walkin’ down the street on our way to the local battle-of-the-banjos competition. Our paps’ were in it, Kim bet me four genuine rat tails that her grandpap would win, and I bet Kim a fresh colony of flee eggs (we’s found ‘um underneath grandpap’s toes.) that mine’s would.
Anyways, it was just about midder-day when the most outlandish thing happened! Now I know you’s non-believers will be throwin’ eggs on my mud shack tonight, but as my pap’s pap’s always said “if thers’ a story to be told, you gotta’ tell it,” and then he would be’s so drunk I just couldn’t understand him. Well, me and Kim just left the Fester’s infected produce market, when there it was, a green squiggly guy. He had huge eyes, and green skin (he must have had ate one of those rotten fish at Fester’s.) He squirmed around with a black top hat and a cane. Kim told me it was called a magic stick. I walked up to him and like the good citizen I’ams I exclaimed “Howdy!” He made a noise dat sounded like those dial-up thingers on AOL. Now I thought that was rude! So I kicked him right in the square-knocker! Right then he exploded like a fire cracker in a pile of fresh cow manure. Except he had green guts. It was all over Kim’s face, it looked like she sneezed real hard. And then a bunch of hoodlums who wore all black, just like them evil Amish, came out of some vehicle that had three letters on it, F.B…oh wait what’s the other? Right! I. I figured it stood for Fungus Butter Island. The Fungus Butter Islanders jumped out of their fancy black carriages and whipped out a ray gun and it was 1981, and just like dat, all ‘em green mucus guts disappeared! The Islanders told us not to worry; it was just some drunk in an alien costume. He made us swear over greecy bacin that we mustn’t tell no one, not even our own pet cockroaches! He said it we told anyone, well, they would explode. And we would too. Just like that green thang. Welp I guess it sucks for me and you guys reading this. Have a lovely day.