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alex xeno's choas
choas that is me ]
Scary in a few diffrent ways.
First one, this journal is scary because I'm actually going to say something serious in here. not something common for me.

Two.. i'm scared. i'm scared of a few things. i'm scared of losing a few things. personal things. personallty things. I have a job offer and it scares me. i'm afrid I'll lose part of who i am and be consumed by the world... when I close my eyes and picture myself I see a warrior in the midst of battle... I know its a wierd sight but its what i see. Also i'm afrid of well the job itself. Its a tec. support job.. and To a few people this will sound really odd,but for somereason I'm afrid of having people relie on me in that way. And well i'm scared i'm not sure if I can say it enough right now. I'm not sure what to do... I don't want to grow up. I want to stay a child forever. I know that sounds weird. but i do. GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

.... I won't..i won't lose myself... I WON'T! I will keep me the same...
I am the child of choas and flames...the thought of death and killing doesn't even scare me... My family.. my choosen family is everything to me and I will never EVER CHANGE! but please.... those who know what i am talking about.. please help me...I won't let the world consume this soul.. I will consume the worlds soul... BOW DOWN TO MY UNSTOPABLE WILL!

I'm going to start selling storys.. well hopefully... tomorrow after the interview i'm typing up a new chapter... hopefully it will be inbumed with my soul and take on a life of its own. Good night world

Xenos Sama
Community Member
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  • User Comments: [4]
    Phillip, I wish you the very best of luck on your Interview, hun!

    comment VoOdOo DoLlZ · Community Member · Thu Mar 01, 2007 @ 04:10am
    wow.. I know exactly what you're talking about! well.. not the tek job, but I'm losing myself to the work world too... pressure builds and and everything seems to scream, GROW UP AND BE OLD AND UNHAPPY!!!! but I refuse too! I'll remain true to who I am, and so should everyone else! including you! >.<

    and if you consume the soul, you should share it with me! 3nodding sounds yummy! x3

    and I wanna read your stories!!!

    and remember, if you want to come and let your inner child play with my inner child, we should have a play date! lol xD in fact, we'll get all of our friend together and have a giant 10 year old party!!! wooo hooo! ^.^

    comment Phantom08 · Community Member · Fri Mar 30, 2007 @ 09:08am
    I'm sorry I'm not there for you like you were for me.
    I wish I could help..

    comment Rikimaroki · Community Member · Tue Apr 03, 2007 @ 03:30am
    Just go with the flow, and do wha you think is right. Honestly I feel the same way, I don't want to grow up.

    comment x!Lingo!x · Community Member · Fri Apr 13, 2007 @ 09:56pm
    User Comments: [4]

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