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Ummm, LOOK! A SQUIRREL! :0~
EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY
Day 683 of My Captivity:

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.
In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomited on the floor.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a ''good little hunter'' I am. The audacity!! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released--and he seems more than willing to return! He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant-- I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. The captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe........ for now. twisted






User Comments: [3] [add]
Acannae
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Fri Sep 08, 2006 @ 05:31am
You're making the kitty seem dumb! crying >.< But I adore your writing! ^^


commentCommented on: Thu Sep 21, 2006 @ 02:13am
ahahahahahahahahaha! So funny! And the kitty doesn't seem dumb, it seems like an evil little spy... ninja so cool



TheWigginator
Community Member
FourChan Anonymous
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Tue Apr 22, 2008 @ 10:15pm
The cats will rise up!!!


User Comments: [3] [add]
 
 
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