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A lot of music that i find favorable or highly relateable at the time. Sometimes i'll be feeling feisty and actually post some quality entries.
i'm having a bad day - negative post
Honestly i was having an ok day, but i should've known something was brewing. I kept dropping things on my way out the door to work, i couldn't find a parking spot at work, i thought i forgot my phone, it was raining, every car was driving SO SLOW on the way into work, i couldn't even read a full page of my book without being interrupted. This was all within the time span of an hour, .....yea i know.

I've been dealing with my own stress for the past couple of days, if not weeks. But i feel like i've been holding it together pretty well considering the mountain i'm facing.

But today was the straw that broke the camel's back.

My coworker and i have started to become close buddies at work, to the point we're known as a duo. Where one goes, the other follows. And thats not so bad, because we do our work and do it well, so there's no complaints. But lately my coworker has been getting a little out of control and playing around too much. We work in a manufacturing environment, so goofing off can be a little scary sometimes, and she tends to take it too far. On top of that, she's been VERY negative about the job, while I love it. It's really starting to eat at me. I just want to do my work and do it well enough that my Team Leader knows i'm a hard worker. So today i pretty much just avoided her, and blamed it on the way we were scheduled. I hope she's not mad at me.

Then by lunch, my boyfriend and i usually call everyday during that time due to our schedules. The past 2 weeks have been super hard for whatever reason. Well today I called and the first thing i wanted to tell him was how horrible of a day i was having, but instead he started to grill me about not calling the night before. He completely bypassed and disregarded what i had to say to make it a POINT that i didn't answer the phone last night. truth be told, i was busy during my lunch time and was unable to talk., but he didn't want to hear it. Then I started to tell him that the relationship isn't doing so well, so he changed topics to talk about a song he heard. THEN, yea like it couldn't get any worse, he tells me he scheduled something for the SAME DAY we were supposed to go to a concert. No big deal, right? Wrong. This concert was expensive, and originally my mom was supposed to come with me but since he wanted to go, she rearranged her flight (since she lives far away) to another month to visit. SO NOW i'm stuck going by myself. I just knew this was going to happen.
So i ended up telling him about himself. I told him exactly how i felt and that i was DONE with this treatment. I don't deserve it. In real life, i'm a really quiet and nice person. I give when i can, i help when i can, i love with all my heart, and i'm loyal AF to those i care about. I don't deserve to be treated as a second choice, or be put on a back burner.
And to think it was only lunch.

After lunch, i was fortunate enough (thank god) to be placed in an area alone to work on something. I was happy to see several co workers reach out to me and to see how i was doing, they all knew i was not having a good day. I have so much on my mind and on my plate, I haven't even mentioned half of it here. ( surprising i know that i keep alot of things to myself.)
Then we got sent home early because we ran out work. That was a blessing.

I'm just tired of this negativity in my life. I can't seem to get away from it. I'm really thinking about a detox from the internet and to really focus on what i'm doing with my life, because right now, where i am....is not a great life but it's paying my bills and keeping a roof over my head.

Right now, i just feel like i'm having a really bad day and i have no one to tell it too. so if you've made it this far, i appreciate you listening/reading about my day and i'm glad someone out there knows how i feel. i just don't feel heard. ever...


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User Comments: [1] [add]
TJ SunBurst
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Sun Feb 16, 2020 @ 09:13pm
You know I care.
I’m sorry to hear you have been going through a lot of rough seas. Message anytime if you need to vent. Or text and I’ll clear time to talk.

❤️-hugs gently-


User Comments: [1] [add]
 
 
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