Birthdays and Surprises
Successful surprises only happen in fairytales because the ending has been written down. Expectations and reality are totally two different things. stare
In high school, a few days from my birthday, I asked whether they were available. I didn't mention about my birthday because I thought that it was weird to bring it up my own birthday. They all said that they were busy. Slightly disappointed, but understanding, I decided to go out with my family instead. Long story short, my friend actually set up a birthday surprise. When I told her my situation, she got so angry. I understood how she felt, but I couldn't just ditch my family just so that her "surprise" would be a success and they be happy, but I won't. From this incident, I realized that surprises are just a nightmare unless you are an expert in planning all possible risks and chances of failures. Of course, I couldn't advise her since I was the one she failed to surprise.
Anyways, after that, I wasn't ever really too keen on birthdays either because I don't like the center of attention and every time my birthday arrives, I get so disappointed.
I always thought that there were certain levels of friendship:
Lvl 1 - Friends in class
Lvl 2 - Friends who you hang out with in/out of class
Lvl 3 - Close Friends
Lvl 4 - Best Friends (i don't have any)
If anyone ever reads this, please care to comment if my standards are too high. sweatdrop
If it's my birthday, I would absolutely appreciate anyone who gives me birthday blessings, whether someone brought it up or they realize it through Facebook notifications. The only time that I get picky is whether my Close Friends do/do not remember my birthday. It may sound childish, but that's who I am and I don't think those standards are high because I always remind myself to treat others as to how I want to be treated (mirror). If I can't do something, I don't expect them to do it to me.
Anyways, one of my close friends said this and it really confuses me and makes me question the whole mirror standard concept. She said that I had the responsibility to remind her of my birthday, but she expects me to remember hers and if I were to ever forget (which I've never forgotten), she would be so angry to the point where she would reconsider our friendship. She even scolded me for not inviting her to my birthday party (which i never had because I thought everyone forgot about my birthday and neither did I go anywhere). We've been friends for nearly six years and she still doesn't remember my birthday. As said above, I am picky about it, but I don't get angry over it because what is done is done, but since I'm human, I do hold a grudge. xp
***There's plenty of other events that happened (birthday unrelated) that have made me reconsider our friendship, but since this topic is on birthdays and surprises, I won't off topic. wink
In conclusion (never conclude anything with "in conclusion" rofl ), I don't even know whether I should hold any expectations. I honestly feel like if I don't care at all (not just birthdays, but overall), I just stepped on my own dignity.