I wonder how many people have to act on a daily basis. Like the thought of actually being myself amazes me. I've had to act for so long that to be honest, I'm not even sure who the real me is. Is there even a real me? I feel like a shell and I just become what people want me to be, because I'm afraid of not doing so. Maybe because when I haven't fit the mold that people have wanted me to be, they've hurt me. I've had everything from words, to fists, to the barrel of my own gun pressed against my head. I want to be able to be the real me...but how can I if I don't even know who that is? How do I find out? Where would I even begin?