I was thinking about it more and Ryan was always kind of an a*****e to me.
for the past like 10 years I don't think he ever initiated a conversation. and whenever i did try to talk to him he would just give me ******** one word responses and s**t like how did i not notice that meant he didn't give a ******** about anything i was saying. The only time he EVER even held like an actual ******** conversation with me was when I was feeling suicidal and he probably just didn't want that s**t on his conscience. i used to think it was because he cared but i really don't think that was ever true tbqh