how many people try to hit you?
lol, ridiculous question.. I do not know~ :p
why? because I never see them try to confess me.
How do i know these person have interest on me? from my friends.
they told me someone always look at me but i never realize for real.

should i says sorry? of course, although i do not know which between me or that person do false. I still says that sorry.
I know this act is wrong to says sorry, but i do not know what to do.
Thank you? Sorry? Or I should not answer?

I have no idea about relationship, couple terms, regulation, jealous, & etc.
for me... my love fate was DIED 19 years ago & I never understand what do you mean by loving terms. i got stuck with this blind love promise. no regret cause i choose these path.

I never believe with happiness they told me... why?
you do not want your child get HURT... if that is what you mean, it is simple.
I do not need to have Boy Friends.
does not mean I am not ready for have one but when romance get across family issue, it just like STUPID DRAMA ever! >.>
I try to avoid romance, does not mean I am not interest.
Sometime I feel like there's no point for me to learn how to get myself into love cause i feel these hurt.

I think because of this mindset of mine, I never know the answer i try to seek.
when I look at myself, I am not surprised but sympathize of myself for holding back a lot. I feel like getting tied with all stupid obligation... no freedom sometime but i still have to accept blame.

There's no point on blaming but look the fact... No one want to be alone & they keep wear steel mask & says I am fine. I hate that cause I notice you try fake on me but you dying!

I know people giggling back on me & says I will work for eternity alone.
who cares? I know these answer for very long time.

sometime i think no point for me to cry, cause I choose these path & no one know.
and sometime i think... can i be so greedy for myself?
although every wish i ever says before turn into nothing. ( yeah, all my wish vanished.... sacrificed into someone's greedy feeling and I become lost myself, my identity, including my purpose to life)

for now what i want to see if there's point for me to love someone?

someone tell me, between what you did & what for yourself have big difference.
although you could make people happy, you makes yourself into wrong direction by push yourself into wrong perception. you cannot help yourself if you dying.
there's no point if you keep doing act for makes people happy, you need someone to able to support you. one day you will into breakdown point & no one can safe you.

do they think i feel empty?
sometime i think yes.
I feel that.
I want to get know sometime if love can fill up the days.
but sadly always on wrong answer.. did i call wrong number? :/

Mostly shocking fact appear when I question these & makes me think something....
does love can be replaceable with something?

And... still no answer, and they keep make me choose love -_-

to tell the fact... I'm fine with love but I dislike hurting.
it will be hard for people who has interest on me cause I am not girly/sexy in first place.
counting how many people who like me? rather than counting them, I make these precious counting about how many people who like to protect me? smile

they weren't hurt me, mostly tell me good things & well sometime i says wrong things but they still kind to me >.<...i am so blessed!
although being too much but I am so happy they were my good friends! x3

to tell the fact, if saying people who get interest on me, mostly hurting me with their manner.. I have no idea what was on their mind that time? -_-

Just want to know how love can work in proper things...
sorry, I get confused sometime... but yeaah...

when love with life become one... does not mean together we can work...
more people..... more trouble coming.... LOL
that's from what i see... I only want to know why person in my life push me to feel in love soon & get myself into marriage too... they have too much time to think of me... but i appreciate them cause i understand i was hard on myself... -_-