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iruka~you didn't have to do that ann
ann~i know. But you shouldn't have to
iruka~thanks ann. You should find someone to talk to
ann~I'll be fine
iruka~please ann. Don't wait until it's too late. At least find someone before you break. It makes it easier
ann~do you really think I will?
iruka~yeah...that was well past your limit ann. There are some things that I just know.
Ann~ *sigh* okay. You're usually right anyway.
iruka~you go get cleaned up then. I'll take care of turning in the report. You always do it for me
ann~wll you don't always get good reports. So I try to have decent ones. Thanks sensei.

After a trip to the bath house, soaking in the water to relax a while, she slowly made her way to the forest. She eventually came to a house and went inside. At the bedroom door she knocked.
ann~kakashi sensei?
She heard some rustling and then a thump before the door opened
ann~hi sensei
kakashi~is something wrong? How was the mission?
Something in ann slowly started to break and her eyes teared up
kakashi~ann?...
ann~i'm sorry...
before kakashi could ask, ann steped towards him and hugged him tight
kakashi~what happened?
ann~i'm sorry...i'm so sorry sensei...
kakashi~what do you mean ann? Tell me
she shook her head
kakashi~you don't need to speak
ann shook her head~unstable
kakashi~ *sigh* i'll move us to the bed
he closed the door and picked her up
kakashi~what do you mean by unstable?
He sat on the bed with her on his lap
ann~emotionally unstable. Have to be stable to not hurt others
kakashi~then what's stopping you from that?
ann~dad is holding it
he nodded and kissed her head
kakashi~can you tell me what's wrong?
ann~don't wait to remember...don't make me remember
kakashi~okay...shhhh...okay
he hugged her tighter and kissed her head. Ann pushed up against him, crying
kakashi~what did she do? Or what happened? This was supposed to be a retieval mission...unless...did iruka die?! Did he...or did she...
he looked up when the door opened. He sighed in relief upon seeing iruka.
iruka~oh, kakashi. Is that ann?
He set his things down and sat with them
iruka~i didn't expect you to come to kakashi
ann~i don't know why...i just...
iruka~don't worry. I'm glad you found someone. I'll get-
they heard the front door open and close
twins~we're home! Daddy?!
Ann screamed and iruka ran out while kakashi tried to calm her

outside iruka grabbed the twins and brought them back out the front door
twins~mommy?!
iruka~you need to keep quiet
kazuki~but that scream!
iruka~i know, I know. Aunty's inside. We just came back from the mission. Ann isn't feeling well right now
name~but...should she be in the hospital then to take care of any injuries?
iruka~not this time. Aunty just needs people she can trust. Come on, we can choose dinner
twins~can't we help aunty?
iruka~not this time I don't think. Kids, I promise she'll be fine.
The two sighed and nodded

kakashi~shhhh...it's okay ann...iruak took the twins to get some food. The kids aren't here. what happened that she can't handle kids
ann~no...not kids...i can't...not again...i can't again...
kakashi~look at me ann. Ann look at me
he made her look up and hold eye contact
kakashi~you're okay ann. There isn't anything here that will make that thing happen again. You're safe here. You don't have to keep acting like a ninja. Do you understand?
Ann nodded and slowly stopped
kakashi~i don't think I can help you this time ann...at least not with the twins running in and out...
ann quietly~sex...
kakashi~what?
ann~sex
kakashi~that's not something that'll help you
ann~you always do
kkakashi~sex is how I cope. Having sex will only hurt your psyche more
ann~please sensei...
she kissed him, but he didn't pull back, knowing that it'd do more harm than good
kakashi~ann, listen. Please understand. Sex works for me because I need that intense affection to tel me it's okay to be human. What you need is someone to tell you that you are human, reguardless of what you had to do on that mission. Sex is just for you to try to get away to not have to deal with this.
He held her shoulders and pulled her from his neck
kakashi~if there's anything I know, it's what someone needs to cope when they're breaking
ann~but...i need it...
she pushed him down and started to remove his pants
kakashi~dammit ann don't you listen?! Ann the one thing I know I learned from you is that you don't use sex as a way to cope. That's your easy way out from not having to feel
she stopped and looked at him
kakashi~i just don't want you to do something you'll regret later...
ann fell on his chest and started crying again
kakashi~do you want to stay longer?
ann~don't make me go...
kakashi~i'm not. You can stay for as long as you like. I just think that you'll need someone else. I know you well enough that you won't tell me what happened on the mission. You need someone to talk to about it and I know that it's not me
ann~how?
kakashi~you would have told me already. She nodded into his chest. Kakashi kissed her head again and pulled up his pants
ann~why didn't stop me?
kakashi~you'd break harder if I stopped you. I've broken enough times to know what'll make things worse
ann~thank you
kakashi~you're welcome. And ann...please don't lose yourself while searching

some days passed, and ann did lose herself. She hardly did anything while at home. An would just sit somewhere for a while and move to a different part of the house. And the only way she let anyone know she wanted something was by sitting at the table, but even then people had to guess what she wanted
kiba~kisame, you're home early
kisame~itachi's helping nobi with some training. He said I could play with ninata so I came home
kiba~okay. Since you'll be here can you watch ann for a while? I need to make sure zabuza's still doing fine with the triplets
kisame~why again are they there?
kiba~children are currently triggers for ann. You don't need to do much. She'll just sit at the table if she wants something. She'll say four or five words tops if she has to speak. She should be in your room right now
kisame~why my room?
Kiba~she knows you won't be home til later and no one really goes in their either. She's just taking advantage of that
kisame sighed~alright. Go before I change my mind about staying
kiba nodded and left after getting a few baby supplies. Afterwards kisame went up to his room to find ann
ann~sorry...i'll go...
as she was getting up, kisame was already walking towards her and flopped her on the bed with him
kisame~you look tired. Get some rest.
ann~but...
kisame~nap. I know you haven’t been getting sleep. You're not the only one with ears. Now sleep.
ann~why so nice?
kisame~because you've done so much for me. I can't replay you enough so the litle things will have to do.
He watched her push into his chest
kisame~i know what happened on your mission. I know you're not proud of what you did. But you need to tell someone. Tell me. You know I don't tell anyone anything. There's still a lot I that I don't itachi
ann~i can't...
kisame~i've done my share of kills ann. I've graduated from the mist academy too. It'd take a lot to judge you. And i'm not clean either
ann sighed~we were fine, until someone found us taking the scrolls. I told iruka i'd take care of it since he was better at identifying scrolls. I killed the guards. The family came next. Too much noise that I couldn't control. Children got involved. There was a slumber party...
kisame squeezed her tight and pressed his head against hers
ann~no...don't...you'll get hurt...
kisame~i already came close to killing myself. I don't think this could be any worse
he pressed harder against her head and groaned as images of the mission came to his mind
ann~sami...
kisame~that isn't the worse that has been done. Don't worry. Your nickname might be demon but you aren't one. You are a person ann. A human being and above all, a mother. A mother whose kids hasn't seen her in over a week now
ann~why do you care about me?
kisame~i want to stay here. It'd be hard to do that without you
ann~nothing else?
kisame~i won't tell
ann~i'm stable enough to use my kekkei genkai again because of you. I think you can tell me
********. i should push you out of my bed
ann~i know you care about me because you care. Not just because of yourself. You like me too
kisame~shutup. You're lucky I like you. Now take your ******** nap. You gave me a headache
ann~i warned you. You did it anyway

a couple hours later kiba came home
kiba~i wonder where kisame is...
he went up and quietly peeked into kisame's room. He saw ann shift and kisame's arm came around to hold her
kiba~i hope kisame is another person to be able to help her.
he closed the door and headed back down to cook dinner

ann~oh, hey sami. Are the kids asleep?
kisame~yeah. I stayed a bit to make sure they wouldn't wake
ann~thanks kisame
kisame moved behind her and hugged her. Ann set the dish she was washing down and leaned against him
ann~are you sick?
kisame~s**t up...just...thank you..for letting me stay here without any expectation aside from taking care of the brats when you ask...
ann washed her hands and then turned around to return the hug
ann~you're welcome. But don't call them brats again. Remember last time?
kisame~broke my ribs and dislocated my shoulder
ann~yeah. So please don't
she snuggled into his chest