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crying If I were to talk to him and say things that I should have said 4 years ago, this is it:

Hi. How have you been? The last time I saw you, you were hanging by your friends and laughing like you guys don't have a care in the world. You often visited back in our school and I still couldn't look you in the eyes or you yourself for that matter. I really liked you back then. But now, I feels stupid for even thinking that you are my first love. Is that a joke? Don't worry, I won't steal you from your current girlfriend. I just want you to know how much you've hurt me without you knowing or noticing it for 4 years. But I don't regret liking you because you gave me good memories too.

You'll always have a special place in my heart but it's smaller than a needle hole, hell it's even smaller than an atom. I believed you, y'know. When you said you wanted to court me instead of my friend. I thought you weren't serious so I said “Hell no!” and you apparently gossiped it around that you courted me, even to my brother. But you didn't. You just suggested it. But still you didn't.

We were close in Facebook chat and you even told me countless times to talk to you personally. But I can't because I feel shy when I'm around you. My heart is like Tarzan in the jungle whenever you're near. You should've been the one though, not me.

I appreciated you trying to catch my attention sometimes and yet with you doing that, you practically piss me off sometimes.

You weren't my first dance or my first dance in Highschool either but when you asked me to dance, it was one of the most awkward yet the most memorable dance of mine. For me, you were adorable even if no one notices. But a lot of girls did when a year passed. Probably because you were friendly and flirty. Truthfully, I fell for the wrong guy.

Your voice was majestic (maybe still is). When you sing, I feel like I wanted to sing with you. Wanted being the operative word because that was in the past.

When I grew an obsession in checking your Facebook profile every day, I kept gushing about you to my best friends (or girl friends). They confronted me one day to stop obsessing about you and that was my worst part, they said. My friends hurt me with painful words all because of you.

So I stopped. I stopped liking you altogether. And I'm glad I did.

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