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Journal of the Gamer

The Gamers King
Community Member
So much HATE
God I have been thinking about this all day, I ******** HATE HER!!!

I hate her with everything I am. Everything she does, its like all she wants to do is make me feel more and more worthless everytime I talk to her. She lies about ******** everything just so she doesn't have to feel bad about what she did.

"You pressured me into the relationship!" b***h! You were the one telling people we were "pretty much together" before I even asked you out. You were the one who spent every ******** minute of your free time with me, every minute talking to me, every minute talking dirty to me. How the ******** did I pressure you into that b***h?

But this is just the most recent of the mountain of bullshit lies shes told, of all the things shes said.

She leaves me, and not even a week later shes already riding another guys c**k. This all after she told me "I just want to be alone, and see what I am like alone." BULLSHIT b***h you wanted a cute guy to ********. "He wasn't planned, I didn't plan anything!" What kind of lame a** excuse is that? You are clearly trying to avoid taking a good look at yourself in the mirror. I've never met someone so far in denial about being a cockthirsty slut its incredible. It's like she literally lives in this fantasy world where shes a great person, and she will do or say anything it takes to protect that self-image of herself because she knows deep down inside, there is the real her, and she cannot face it because she cannot come to grips with how awful a person she is.

I mean, she pretty much told me she is horny 24/7 and that she thinks I'm ugly. Sure, if thats true whatever, you're a shallow b***h but whatever, but at least own up to it. Don't try to hide behind this web of ******** lies you've created for yourself, don't try and be something you're not. Just tell yourself "Well, it's true, I am a cockthirsty slut and I manipulated you for self-confidence then threw you away when I didn't need you anymore and I got a cute guy."

And its not like this is even the first time this skank has done this to me either. I mean, the first time she did the same thing, albiet in this case I did "sort of" pressure her, though she DID want it. Then she left me for a guy who treated her like s**t for years(thank you karma for that one) and leaves me after I help her break up with him, spend every day and night talking to her, trying to make her feel like the most beautiful girl in the world(Even though her only really attractive quality is her tits), just because I loved the kind of person I thought she was before all this happened.

I thought she was a hopeless romantic like me, I thought she was the kind of girl who believed in true love, and that she had indeed realized that I was someone worth keeping. But no, no, nope, no, nope. Apparently I AM THE a*****e because I expected better of her. Apparently I am the a*****e according to her because I was pressuring her to be what I wanted her to be. But thats total bullshit, I didn't fall in love with her in the first place because she was someone I could mold into something else. No, instead I loved her for what SHE TOLD ME SHE WAS. You know, all the things WE SPENT WEEKS TALKING ABOUT?!?!? I wasn't the one putting words in your mouth, so own up to your own ******** actions.

Then she has the gall to tell me to grow the hell up? She can't even admit to what she did. Not ONCE has she made a sincere apology. She just said "Sorry this is a shitty thing to do but I'm breaking up with you." VIA TEXT. AGAIN. After she knew how ******** up I thought that was, as if all the other things she was letting me down about weren't enough.

"Your just mad because at my ability to find relationships, instead of being, forever alone maybe?" like, if that isn't something straight out of the skank handbook I don't know what is. I bet she's such a ******** worthless black hole of emotions she can't even bear to come to terms with herself without tearing herself apart. If she ever took a good hard look at her actions, and her words, she would realize just what kind of filth she is.

Then she has the ******** nerve to say I was trying to manipulating her to going back out with her? The ******** did she ever get that idea from? I basically told her over and over how much I hated her, and how much I was going to get my revenge for what she did.

All she has ever done since we broke up is pretend to be friends with me so she can make herself feel superior to me. She repeatedly would make fun of me when I told her how much I hurt, making me feel worthless. She would try to talk about cute guys as if I wasn't even anything, as if I was just some worthless thing she used to get her confidence back. Then a week later shes ******** another guy. She didn't even see him more than 3 times and shes already ******** him? What happened to dating someone for awhile then you know, after a good amount of time getting to know someone, then having sex with them.

Like seriously, I hope he gets her pregnant, cheats on her, then leaves her with a baby so she can't finish her schooling, then she gets another man who gets her knocked up again and leaves her, then again, and again, and again. So she can know what it truly feels like to be worthless, to be thrown away, to be as deeply cut as she cut me.

She can spend all day everyday calling me childish, because she can't take one ******** look at herself in a mirror, she can't even admit to herself that what she is CURRENTLY DOING, is ******** up beyond belief. God if I wasn't so ******** far away I feel like I would murder her, I really do, and I am a ******** pacifist, thats how much I hate this woman for hurting me like this.

Ugh... how can a 1 month relationship with a girl make me hurt THIS much? Did I really love her that much? She said I only loved the idea of her, the outer shell she put on for me. But did I really? If so, did I ever really know her? Or was she just pretending to be what I thought was great about her? Pretending to be the great qualities I liked just to... what? String me along? This makes no sense. Why would she do that? Even now it still hurts me that she would use me the way she did... I should be over this s**t already. I am so ******** done with this skank. But every ******** night I can't sleep because of how worthless she makes me feel. I hate her so ******** much, maybe... because I loved her so much...

I don't know... this hurt a lot to write, but I am glad I got all my feelings out... maybe I can be done with them now.

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