After talking to one of my roommates, I'm pretty sure I need to address something in the near future. (I have a couple roommates because I also live in my college dorm) At least I know I will have a place to stay, but I can't keep doing what I am doing. The guy I'm currently dating probably isn't going to change, and I think I can accept that(My roommate on campus made a non nonchalant comment about how I am dating an a*****e.) I feel like that writing here has been a slight outlet, but the more I delve deeper into my mind, the more I realize it's not okay. I have feelings that I can't shake, and it scares me. I have secrets about my own feelings my closest friends know even know. I don't want to looked at as a tarnished person, but I'm human. The most painful, and beautiful part of being alive is that we live everyday, just to see what will be different tomorrow. I feel like I am on the verge of tears, because I don't know what is true anymore, or what is safe to say. I really can't talk about what is wrong because it's more complicated than I let on. I'm starting to think that people are noticing.
Well, I managed to write some more before I had a crisis about my own love life.

“There was nothing they could have done to help me. Instead of helping me deal with my anger, they merely told me to hide it. Why hide something that destroys you from the inside out?” His head dipped slightly lower as he glanced at their reflection from off of the control panel.

She still managed to hold a serene beauty even when her stance was marred by her fear. Fairen was never quite able to fill out her uniforms, and the loose cloth hanging off of her helped add a more youthful appearance. Her petite waist only accentuated her curved hips and thighs, the plateaus so perfect it was like his hands were made to hold her. The nostalgia opened a deep pain, and it felt like his heart was falling out of his ribcage each time he had a new memory.

Fairen’s clear lyric voice brought him back from the voids of his mind. Her body trembled with each word she choked out.

“ I never told you to hide it Kairos.” The sound of his name leaving her lungs caused him to gasp quietly. She heard him, and turned her head towards their reflection, so that she could catch his eyes there.
“I told you that I loved you, and that as long as you were willing to talk to me everything would be fine. What happened to Master Tyloff wasn’t your fault.”