I need to get this off of my chest so i'm posting it here

my name is Mrs Dowdy I'm 24 and i have autisim

I have never known my real father, He had never called me when i was little no visits my poppy (Grandfather) told me he was a bad man.
as I got older i kept wondering "who is he where is he do i look like him?" when my brother's dad would visit and mine would not i was sad alot. When i turned 13 my mom took me to see my grandmother on his side thinking that maybe she could get him to talk to me, She called me later saying that "all you people want is child support so unless your mom is out of the picture completely don't ever call me again!"
that was the worst Christmas of my life.
i was crushed it took months for me to stop crying (Some times i still do) a year and a half ago i get on facebook and read a message from a little girl with my last name "hey my name is Stephanie and you have to be me big sister look at us you look like me we have the same last name dont shut me out i need you in my life. Dad got drunk one night and let slip i had an older sister and i have been searching for and i finally found you" i was so moved we talked for a long time and finally talked on th phone for hours about everything, dad found out and cut her phone off had her delete her facebook an every thing.
The week of my wedding a sent message through our cousin "my only link to her" that i was getting married and did she want to come. She (I think not sure if was her or dad) You are not my sister dad told me that we are not related and he was not your dad that none of his other kids had mental conditions so thats how he knew, so do not contact me again you fake...
my heart is shattered i need someone to talk too.