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i wish i could talk to people about my horrifying dreams, not scary, but what i do in them is terrifying....... i dunno if they are past lives, and that i was some evil human..... im afraid i will never make it to heaven because of my past lives..... and im afraid that my life is the way it is because i deserve this shitty life because of my past lives. i terrify myself so much, makes me feel im not human at all.... and that now that my mom is dead, she too knows of my past lives and thats why she stopped visiting me...... i hate me so much, and maybe that these reasons are why i don't get to see my daughter barely....

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