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Matthew Bartlett is awesome razz

Community Member
My life.
I don't really know how these are meant to start but f*** it...
I was born along with my twin (I'm the eldest) on December the 24th in 1996 at Blacktown hospital NSW Australia, My mum at the time was 19.
I first lived at st Clair, but then moved to lethbridge park, then to st Clair again and then to erskine park all before I turned 2. The next 3 1/2 years were spent living on an urban farm (only had a lot of cows, 6 ducks, 4 rabbits, around 7000000 snakes (i owned none) and around 7 dogs and 3 cats) After a while of living in this haunted, falling apart house living next to a high ranking member of the Comanchero's (bike gang) and with snakes and spiders literally everywhere we moved again (reluctantly, as james erskine was an awesome school) to Tregear in a house on Elsworth drive (the only good side of that area thank god!) i then went to tregear public (an absolute s**t hole) in year one where i got beaten up by another year one kid with his cast because he was a bogan and his family is feral. I then got blamed for something I didn't do, so my mum wanted to pull me out of the school only for the principal to say something along the lines of "You can't take them out, They are my student's, you don't have the right, i have control over them" so my dad punched him in the face while my mum destroyed his office and just never took me back there, that was quick 4 months.
My mum then got in contact with my friends mum who had just moved her son out of the same school to the school i would then go to Noumea primary school, my mum in this time had 1 son and 1 daughter a year after, when i was in year 4 my parents split up it was pretty dramatic experience with my dad beating up my mum and my mum sort of stabbing him in the back with a knife, we were kicked out of the house though my mum and my brothers and sister who was only 2 at the time, which left us homeless living in and out of my mums friends houses and granny-flats eventually though we settled into where i still live 7-8 years later back at lethbridge park around the corner of my old house, i stayed there until year 6 barely making more friends in the years up till year 5 then i gained, in year 5 i was basically friendless, until i met my soon to be best friend. We ended up doing everything together and i made friends with his friends all of which were sort of dorks, and he made friends with the 2 friends of mine that i had made that same year.
after year 6 I of course went to middle school for 4 years at shalvey we were all still friends with the exception of 3 leaving for another school, In this school i was teased over nothing, just teased, i wasn't fat, I'm not ugly, I'm just not anything really, but i was teased these people by the way were my brother and people i called friends, my best friend thankfully wasn't a part of it. But all this had a lasting effect on me, i slowly became depressed, But was saved when i met my ex in year 8 she was in year 7, we had a longish lasting relationship she wasn't my first girlfriend but she was the only one who i really remember/became emotionally attached to, we went out for almost a year 11 months and 2 weeks, only for her to cheat on me (just making out), but we were still friends, i was her best friend, i sat by and watched as she ******** him (not literally) (i was still a virgin razz still am crying ) After 7 months or so she broke up with him and stupidly i went back out with her confused stupid decision, after yet again around 11 months though she cheated on me again with 3 guys (sex with each of them, all fat) and i yet again fell to depression, i still haven't come out of it it, year 10 at that moment.

Now i am in high school, still no problem solved, still depressed, having problems trusting people and going into a relationship, have really good friends now though, having family problems, i wanna kill myself, found out 2 weeks ago have heart problems. nothing serious just fast beating and irregular beats e.g going from 70-80 bpm to 170-180 bpm, I can't seem to get a grip on life and everything keeps getting worse. When ever i finally manage to become happy It collapses and i become more depressed than i was before. I cant seem to get on track at all, and i keep getting the thoughts of ending it all.

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