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Yay It's Molly's Blog!
My Gaian/real life.
Talk About <3
1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie.
I was only about 4 or 5, I watched the Wizard of Oz for the first time and I instantly fell in love with it.

2: Talk about your first kiss.
My first kiss, my first real kiss, was with my boyfriend in his basement, it was the first time I'd ever been at his house and it was 6 days after he asked me out. I remember thinking it felt sooo perfect being with him. I truly felt the fireworks everyone talks about.

3: Talk about the person you've had the most intense romantic feelings for.
He's my shining star, my angel. He makes me feel whole, he is my other half. I have the best times with him because around him I can truly be myself. He's the light of my life.

4: Talk about the thing you regret most so far.
The thing I regret most so far in my life is all the time I spent worrying about my appearance. I used to be so depressed because kids would make fun of me and call me fat and I hate how I handled it. I didn't do anything, I let them get to me and I would cry and they made me feel ugly. If I could go back and change things, I'd tell them to piss off and I'd learn to love myself for who I was.

5: Talk about the best birthday you've had.
The best birthday I've ever had was my 17th because it was my first birthday with my boyfriend. My parents took us out to eat and we had cake and presents and stuff and it was amazing because I got to spend my birthday with him.

6: Talk about the worst birthday you've had.
The worst birthday I had was my 14th because I don't even remember it. Hahahaha.

7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.
My biggest insecurity is my weight. I don't like being big but I'm trying to be confident.

8: Talk about the thing you are most proud of.
I'm most proud of all of my accomplishments in school such as my awards, certificates, straight A's, and of course my diploma.

9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.
The things I like most on my body are my eyes because they have a unique green and gold color, I like my hair, and I like my hands and nails because I always have them painted a cute color.

10: Talk about the biggest fight you've ever had.
The biggest fight I've ever had was with a teacher. It wasn't physical or anything, she just refused to let me go to the bathroom even though I had a nurse's note. I called my mom and she raised hell up at the principal's office, lol but I pretty much told the teacher off myself too.

11: Talk about the best dream you've ever had.
The best dream I've ever had was probably the one where I met Marilyn Manson haha.

12: Talk about the worst dream you've ever had.
The worst dream I've ever had was a week before prom and in my dream my boyfriend stood me up at prom haha even though I know it would never happen.

13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time.
I don't really think that's something I should talk about, those kind of things are personal to me.

14: Talk about a vacation.
Omg the best vacation I ever went on was after graduation and my parents took me and my boyfriend to Las Vegas. It was so much fun. I had lots of graduation money to spend and I bought a bunch of cool things at all the shops there. And I got to spend every day and night with my boyfriend, swimming, playing in the arcade, and we went to Freemont Circle and I met Michael Jackson, Tupac, and more. They were impersonators of course but it was sooo much fun!! I was so sad when we had to go home.

15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.
I'm very content with my life right now and I become more and more content every day. I get to spend almost every day with my boyfriend and I'm planning on marrying him next year. I have a family that loves me and I'm finally learning to love myself.

16: Talk about the best party you've ever been to.
The best party I've ever been to was probably a sleepover at my friends' house, it was so much fun haha we played games, ate a lot of food, and went to a playground across the street from her house. It was crazy.

17: Talk about someone you want to be friends with.
I want to be friends with Marilyn Manson, I know he's famous and probably wouldn't want to be friends with me haha but I think he's a very interesting person and I feel like we have a lot in common, especially after I read his book.

18: Talk about something that happened in elementary school.
In elementary school I moved across the country and I hated leaving my friends behind but I found something even better: a teacher who pushed me into a writing career at only age 8, and also changed my life forever. <3 I'll never forget her.

19: Talk about something that happened in middle school.
Everything that happened in middle school sucked, I was constantly picked on, I was bullied to the point where I couldn't even ride the bus anymore, kids cussed me out every day, I had to eat lunch with teachers because people were so mean to me in the cafeteria, I used to get water and soup poured on my head, kids tried to steal my cell phone on the bus, this boy told me he wished I would die, and one girl in gym sprayed almost an entire can of spray deodorant on me.

20: Talk about something that happened in high school.
In high school I found my love for art, I became pretty good at it, and I also met my boyfriend there which is by far the best thing to ever happen to me. I also met my best friend and for the first time in a long time I felt truly accepted by people.

21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.
There was a boy in 9th grade who kept asking me out and I kept telling him no because it didn't feel right and I didn't feel the same about him. I felt kind of bad but I wasn't about to try to change my feelings for him because I just didn't feel anything...

22: Talk about your worst fear.
My worst fear is death. Like I'm not scared of dying, but I'm scared of people I love dying. My granny died and my world just about fell apart, I miss her so much and I never want to lose my boyfriend, my mom, my family, or even my dogs. It's just too much for me to handle.

23: Talk about a time someone turned you down.
When I was in 8th grade I liked a boy and I had a friend ask him out for me because I was too shy to do it myself and he said no. Haha.

24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.
My boyfriend tells me every day that I'm beautiful, and though I may never see myself the same way he sees me, I know he means it. And it means a lot to me because I spent so much of my life believing I was ugly and worthless and he turned it all around for me. He helped me gain confidence, before he was even my boyfriend, even when he was just my best friend. I can never thank him enough for that.

25: Talk about an ex-best friend.
I had a best friend who was like a sister to me, she was my rock. We did everything together, she was always at my house and I would laugh so so much with her and we had so much fun together. She had a pretty hard life and she had bad things happen to her but I always helped her cope with them. And that made us stronger. For a while. And then over time our bond kind of fell apart. Suddenly we weren't texting eachother as much and I don't remember why. Then we just stopped talking altogether. I got a feeling that she was spending more time with her other friends because she didn't go to the same school as me and she also started talking about nothing but boys and I got sick of it. It's all whatever though, I've moved on.

26: Talk about things you do when you're sick.
When I'm sick I like to sleep a lot, watch TV, see my boyfriend, and he usually makes me feel better with CUDDLES<3

27: Talk about your favorite part of someone else's body.
My favorite part of my boyfriend's body is his smile. I love his smile because I know that when I see it, that means he's happy and that means everything to me. I'd go to any lengths to see that smile smile It's my biggest joy.

28: Talk about your fetishes.
I don't really have any to talk about, I think they're kinda weird.

29: Talk about what turns you on.
What turns me on to someone (not physically but mentally) is someone who tries to do good for others, is a kind person, and not afraid to be themselves. I like when people are down to earth and also have a good sense of humor.

30: Talk about what turns you off.
What turns me off is when people try too hard to be something they're not. I also don't like when people are rude.

31: Talk about what you think death is like.
I think death is peaceful, I think death is like a birth, just in a new world. I think death is calm, quiet, you leave your body and transcend into a non earthly surrounding. I think you see colors and sights you may not understand. I think everything will fall into place after you die, I think you'll get closure as to why you lived.

32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.
A place I remember from childhood is my sister's room. I was so fascinated by it when I was little and it was my favorite place to be. I was about 6 and she was 16, in high school, a big world of amazing adventures. I used to crawl into her wicker chair, watch her VHS movies, look at her drawings on the wall of cartoons that her friends made her. I used to look through her yearbooks, at all the older kids. I used to play with her markers and crayons and paper. She used to write song lyrics down on paper and then tape them up on the wall. I wanted to be just like her.

33: Talk about what you do when you are sad.
When I'm sad I talk to my boyfriend. He usually helps me by talking to me and holding me until I feel better. And if he's not here I usually watch something funny to try to distract me.

34: Talk about the worst physical pain you've endured.
The worst physcial pain I've endured is my oral surgery when i got my impacted wisdom teeth removed, they had to cut open my jaw and take my teeth out. It hurt for weeks and it even happened over christmas break. It sucked.

35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.
I wish i could stop panicking and worrying so much. I hate it.

36: Talk about your guilty pleasures.
My guilty pleasures are food, looking at funny animal pictures, and watching My Little Pony.

37: Talk about someone you thought you were in love with.
When I was 16 this boy asked me out, and I know I didn't really like him in that way but I said yes anyway. I just wanted to see what a relationship was like because all my friends were in relationships. It was awful. I tried to convince myself I loved him and for a while I thought maybe I really did but he changed, starting to ignore me and told me that i wasn't worth anything. That's when I knew I didn't really love him.

38: Talk about songs that remind you of certain people.
Songs that remind me of my boyfriend are Don't Wanna Miss a Thing, How Do I Live, and This I Promise You.

39: Talk about things you wish you'd known earlier.
I wish I'd known that life would fall together. I used to think my life would drag on without purpose but I was very wrong. i wish I had kept faith. I pretty much gave up on myself- more than once- but I wish I'd known that I was stronger than I gave myself credit for.

40: Talk about the end of something in your life.
The end of my childhood- there is no specific event to mark it, it was just something that came and went. Right now I feel as though I'm no longer a teenager but not quite an adult either. I'm in the middle. After I graduated high school I knew that chapter of my life ended and now i can only hope to go onto bigger better things.

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