should be goig to see wolverine this friday, arms getting better, going to try the gym wednesday, and going to also try to get some photo id for the osap so i can go to collage in september. i hate that i have to do most of it alone because no one is reliable but what can you do, right?
was questioning weather or not to message "her" after the friday thing, but i decided it would be a bad idea, would hurt to much. keep thinking about it thou but i just end up seeming stalker-ish. like what would i even say? not like i can be outright honest with her and say,
"i still think about you every day. its been years and not one person makes me feel like you did. i cant seem to actually love anyone because your the only one i wanted. ive gain weight because its hard to live every day knowing what meant that much was torn from me and even leaving the house feels like the most pointless thing in the world knowing that there's nothing when i get back. every day is only a new day of pain and suffering and the only thing that can make me feel anything but the numb sadness is the thought of you, even if that's y i feel the pain."
yea, 5 years and that still sounds like the most creepy and a little over the top. least i think 5 years.
im no stalker, just a guy that hurts and misses someone that made him feel like he mattered to a person much grater then himself, but isn't missed in return.