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Bunch of Rants and Bull!@#$
nothing in this world will ever go right...
i just wanna go
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I just wanna go somewhere where no one,
not even god, can find me...
I want to go to a place
where there is nothing but black.
I want to head to where music is heard.
All i want to do is play.
But i just want to go away.
from a world that cares.
Fade to black.
and not come back.

I want to head to a world
that I feel like I won't be missed.
if i run to where i please
I want to head anywhere.
just plain anywhere but here.

I just wanna die.
I wanna see red on my neck
and feel like drowning.
I don't have the courage
i just think about my death.

people say I'm beautiful
and kind, smart, witty.
but what do I know?
I hate my appearances.
They can say what they like
I'll never meet their expectations.

If I live with my mother,
I won't be happy with her new spouse.
If i live with my father,
i won't be happy with him drinking with his new spouse.
I told her how i felt. My only person
i can speak to. I told her

How would you feel, if I chose
to live with dad instead?
I can't accept this new love in your life.
no matter how kind he is towards me.
I just can't accept him. He's only
taking you away from me.
You're always gone and I'd rather
stick around with my father instead.

That tone of voice
that no child wants to hear
"go live with him then, if that's what you want"
Is this the sound of a simple "Go f*ck yourself?"
"Do what you want, I don't give a f*ck about you anymore"?
Am I no longer her friend?
Who am I supposed to spill
all my worries and all my troubles?

Am I dead to you?

I don't know what to do anymore.
I feel alone...but I just want to go away to nothingness.
where there are no feelings. i wont get hurt.
If I cant trust my own mother, who the hell
am I supposed to trust??


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