Focusing on the names of polyatomic ions, I sat in the chair. C2H3O2-, Acetate, yes that is the name of it. Sweet i was right, my God chemistry is kicking me in the d**k. Phosphate? umm, yes, PO3. ********. PO4.
[******** idot
OK, ok no big deal, just relax.
Fine, i will.
No we're not.
Well s**t I am trying.
To relax or study?
No you are lying.
Yes, haha.

Pressure on my neck. oh God.
Gentle. Passion? Oh God.
Anyone but her. Please not her. I will take anyone but her. At least that way I can laugh it off.
Wait for their response.
"Thought that was you." Now i won’t eat.
Focus. Focus. Focus you scrawny b***h.

Some months and several hours earlier.
Yelling violent words.
Quiet. Find quietness. Loosing it. Dont remember how i got it.

Fast forward a few hours.
Darkness. Crickets. 4 empty bottles, so not too many, empty at my feet. Heavy metal in my hand, quietness in my mind. Cold circle pressed against my temple. Peace is promised.

Jump back to now.
Circle is frigid, pressure is warm. If only that pressure was cool, easy to grip, understand that. Why her? Anyone else would be easy to process, laugh, or just ignore.
No, you shut the ******** up. I will not focus.

God my neck, my temple.
Not what she needs, never will be. I know this. Do they? dunno. Do I want her to know? No. She wants niceties that are out of my reach, now and tomorrow.
I am trying. I am falling at failing.
Breathe then.
That is just gas exchange. Ideal gas law. elasticity. we worked well.
Sorry. I dunno.