I don't like ramblers. Or more like I don't like it when people ramble.

This is no epiphany. I just never spent any thought on it because why would I need to? It's enough to know they irritate you, and why they do is pretty obvious. But I got to thinking about it today because I realized that a lot of ramblers tend to be stingy with details when I actually ask for them.

Just wtf.

It's like they've got a frog in their head that eats up their common sense. Just what is the source of this malfunction that tells a rambler it's okay to spend 10 minutes to explain a simple yes or no answer but to give me only one-word responses to questions or requests like, "What is your address?" or, "Explain the tattoo in as much detail as you can, please."

I know I shouldn't demand logic from the illogical, but all the same? I should get paid for all of the time that ramblers have cost me in my life.

And this is why I think Marvel should endorse my supervillain, and he shall be called The F***ing Rambler. If they can toss us brilliant gems such as a vampire cow from hell, I'm sure they can work in a rambling supervillain who can melt the brains of our would-be superheroes with his inane ability to go on and on about $hit that mean absolutely nothing in the long run but prevents our heroes from actually getting their jobs done.

Takes the literal into the literary, this would be iconoclastic, just the sort of thing that Marvel likes to pump out to the apocalyptically bored. And as long as I get paid royalties for giving them the idea and I don't actually have to read those comics, I'd feel vindicated.

And this is ALSO why I don't like talking on the phone, because people ramble more on there than they do anywhere else.

I should call the Rant Line, but then I could catch the infection and turn into a rambler myself. Arguments are, it may already be too late.