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BB's 'Hidden' Journal
My online record of mostly rantings and complaints.
they're closing backyard monsters!!! that is so ******** up! i finally get it to work on a damned pc and it's closing!! scream

*sob* emo

and zOMG is lagging like hell still........was making good money off booty grab and zOMG too. like after three days i'm at 100k. course i keep spending it on random s**t in the marketplace......but ya know one day i can sell it back for more money twisted
yup. that's my justification for buying 20x laquered wood, 10x snake eyes, 30x bronze, 5x axe heads, 80x twigs, and 50x dyes. and a few flowers ninja so not much. still random and i don't want them xd

i finally found something good about living withing a couple hours of Ocean City! vacationists! a ton of jobs are popping up now to prep for the summer. I'm so psyked! (lol warhammer spelling) Lucky for me, a lot of the places I'm looking for a job are places that get hit heavy all during the summer, fall and winter. spring, not so much. not so many holidays there, but there are sales. lol probably to counter the holiday-less of it! xd

speaking of ocean city, joseph went there for senior week. of course. i wanna hate him sooooo bad. he's like all the other kids here. he's lived in this area forever, so have his parents, and he knows the land in and out, and everyone in it. he can walk down any street and strike up a conversation with anyone about something that happened yesterday or 10yrs ago. he's just so typical.
listens in school but doesn't study that hard, plays video games most his off-time, goes paint-balling/laser tag/ airsoft with his friends, hangs out with any of 20 friends for weeks at a time the party just dwitching houses. goes away on weekend or week long trips with them and parties like they're all 25.
gods i wanna hate him. lucky little b*****d.

ok topic change before i start crying. or throwing stuff. havn't decided which yet.

I presented my scanography project today, and they think it's creepy too gonk sucks. oh well. it's done now xd have to do my hands still.

not working. still pissed. yup. definitly pissed now. lol at everything.

random thought; i wonder what would happen if i met a "real" vampire. i don't know if i'd be like a marine biologist that found the giant squid, or if i'd be disappointed. mythology (particularily vampires) were my life years ago. consumed every thought......would meeting something in person that would prove all my work to be true make me happy or sad? lol i really don't know. like kakashi actually removing his mask. you want it so bad, but wouldn't it be disappointing? lol idk. maybe it's just me. just enjoy hunting things more than catching them? -sigh-
lol thought about it awhile last night. well dreamed. i bought him a drink lol i wasn't happy or disappointed though. just relived. and it had nothing at to do with his being a vampire at all. ugh. my dreams can really piss me off. they're so direct you can't try to read into them or wish for more, yet they're so vague you can't understand what it's saying at all.
course if anything was actually said in my dreams, i might understand more.......at least this dream wasn't in anime. and there was red too not just black and white. there was something else too.....i can't remember it. i think it was a sound.....but that might've just been a felt sound not a real sound. nope. there was. i remember it now. was the tiniest of sounds.......shirt rustling. he was reaching for his drink and i heard for just that moment. lol improvement indeed!! should i really be so excited over something so small? yes. yes i should. i'm going to be. i'm going to be bloody ecstatic over it.
at least it was just a dream.......
maybe i should pick my research up again. hmm....i dunno. so much is on the internet now, and so much of it hard to find the truth in. guess i'll just have to keep an eye out. like those damned books. i wish mother put money on my card....then i could buy those books when they come up! now i'm just searching for things that I know won't be there.....lol sad. but i really loved those books. among other things. gods i'm going to be broke my whole life xd

i totally forgot!! i'm supposed to be saving for tokyo. damn. oh well. neither of us speak japanese anyways. i'll find something else he'll love even more to do. Alhambra maybe? lol only if there was a war museum attached. i don't want to get him gaming stuff, i want it to be better. guess i could take him to welland for a week. don't know if that's enough though. well i have a year to think on it still.
oh, and i'm going to otakon!! well......almost. still have to "finish". stupid. totally done.

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