I forgot the beauties of that feeling... That addicting ecstasy... Love... I got a week of really being in the core of it, and it was... Paradise. It was in his hair, his touch, his skin, his scent. It was in the way our hands would find each other, the way our lips would press softly and so patiently against one another enjoying and relishing in the seconds of each kiss... It was in that comfort of being in his hold as the night passed. In every smile... Every thought... Every heart beat... I felt it. Yet... I forgot how horrible it is, Love... Why I trusted that feeling the least. Because if things go down hill...what then? It went on for so long, yet disappeared in the blink of an eye.
Today.. has got to be one of the worst days I could ever have. And in the back of my head, I'll always wonder... always wish... always yearn... I will always be looking back over my shoulder... This defeated feeling burns me... I feel some part of me lost... Life is never easy they say, and I've got a say... these coming days/weeks/months/years are gonna be the hardest trial before me. Walls coming up again while obtaining the carefree air of life, the refusal to need intimate love, the head strong way of obtaining goals... Bottling it all away... cherishing it in new eyes... I don't know... If I can do all this... I don't know... about my future... Whatever is possible now... Is completely up to fate I suppose... especially in the category of my current heart break...
Still, this is one of those things I just can't seem to stop failing at in life... And for once... It truly bothers me...
Sayonara... Anata... Honto ni Aishiteru yo... </ [Shattered] /3
Obviously... I was way too emotional, to think straight. dramallama
Oh, hey look!!! I can handle it! biggrin
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Hmm...i guess this journal would be ...welll like any other one...updates of my life...and...err...stuff...to tell you the truth i'm not good at keeping these types of things up to date but i guess i could try! ^_^