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right now, i am debating as to whther i should intentionally completely lose control of my bladder or not. i enjoy wearing diapers, and sometimes wetting myself without diapers, so that people can see the darki wet patch and know exactly what i did. i need to pee right now, i am kinda letting it out a few drops at a time, because i am on a leather couch, lol. imma leave soon, so i might jsut release the rest then. i enjoy wetting myself with or without diapers. if i don't have diapers on, i get the WONDERFUL humiliation of people knowing i peed myself. when i am wearing diapers, the diaper usually ends up leaking, because i make it a point to drink a lot of fluid. then my pants are bulgy *and* wet. such a great feeling for me. anyways, feel free to comment on this, i would like for people to put their 2 cents in (aka: how much fluid to drink per day, how many times i should use the toilet to pee if at all, ect.) keep in mind that i can hold my pee in for hours, literally. take that into account when you tell me the amount of fluid that i should drink. the more fluid=the less time it takes for me to actually lost control as opposed to just intentionally wetting myself. also, any ideas of where to wet my pants and/or diaper? any thoughts on this would be good too, just don't tell me that its wrong or anything. i KNOW its not normal, and i really don't care. telling me its messed up is not going to change anything. well, hope to hear comments on this!

-Amy-