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Surens Dark Corner
Rated M For Mature audiences only. Enter only if cussing doesn't affect you in the slightest.
Suren-kun, REVAMPED
Rated M for Mothers best be makin sure their kids not be readin this.

Another episode of fifteen minutes in the mind of Suren-kun.

Start time: 12:30am

Suren-kun on hippies:

God damn you worthless pot smoking stupid sons of ******** bitches that can't take the fact that you have to work to earn something in this damn world so you sit outside my house and play in your little happy happy drum circles with your dumbshit weed and expect me to stand there and NOT lop all your heads off with a chainsaw.

Suren-kun on weapons:

If it kills things, it needs a chainsaw attached to the b***h.

Even if it's a chainsaw.

Suren-kun on bladed weapons:

I dunno, maybe it's just me but I find it so much more satisfying to cleave a guy in half then to smash his brains in with a hammer.

Suren-kun on roleplaying (again. You ********) :

The recent trend of cybering roleplays is beginning to scare me. Not because it means that they're invading my god damn thread once more but because it means that I have to block more and more people whenever I get on. Which means more work for me >o

And I work enough already you sons of bitches. Learn to keep your e-peen in your e-pants.

Also, it's a GUY.

Get over it.

You are now bisexual.

Suren-kun on gayness and bisexuality:

I'm okay with gay marriage, so long as both chicks are hot.

Suren-kun on beauty:

Don't.
********.
Care.

So long as you're not equator ******** wide and a complete and total dipshit. (2+2 = ******** FOUR DIPSHIT) I will accept you.

Why?

Not because you look like Angelina Jolie but because you can keep me interested for more then five seconds without me having to divert to staring at your god damn chest for the entire time I'm explaining how babies are made.

Suren-kun on chivalry:

Shut the ******** up about chivalry. The funny god damn thing is I don't GIVE A s**t if the guy you're dating doesn't open the car door for you or hold the door open for you. IT'S YOUR OWN DAMN FAULT.

Why?

Because you're the one who ******** broke the nice guy's heart.
You're the one who dates the a*****e over the caring friend.
You're the one who wanted to be ******** EMPOWERED. So we gave you the god damn power to do things for yourself and you b***h about it like you usually DO!

Suren-kun on sexism:

No.

I am not sexist.

If I'm sexist then every woman who's made a comment about how all men are pigs or how all men are only interested in beauty or chest size is sexist. So shut the ******** up.

Suren-kun on RAAAAAGGEEEEE:

kjklgsjsk;ldfgjk;lsjg;lkdsjg RAWRRRRRRRRRrrr

Suren-kun on gun laws:

We need to put more guns in the hands of idiots.

Why? Because they're retarded dipshits. But Joseph, you might ask. "Won't they hurt other people?"

Yes.

Who do you think hangs out with dipshits?

OTHER DIPSHITS DIPSHIT!

It's called killing two birds with one stone because with any luck the guilt will drive dipshit one insane from having killed dipshit two and he'll off himself. Hopefully not with a noose because he'll probably tie it wrong.

Suren-kun on suicide:

You whiny bitches.

Suren-kun on Emo-kids, noncomforming as can be!:

Alright.

You whine.
You b***h.
You complain.
You apparently have the ache in YOUR SOULLLLLLLLL

But the question is.

Why should I GIVE a flying ******** that your mother won't buy your god damn pretty boy self some eyeliner because Sally won't recognize you?!

WHY?!

WHY I ASK YOU?!

Suren-kun on Scene:

I personally like the emo look so taking the look and transferring it over to a non-emo bullshit thing works.

It works so very well.

Suren-kun on taking over the world:

Just ask Pinky and the Brain.

Suren-kun on the new generation:

******** your mothers.

******** your fathers.

How can none of you remember what "Ahh! Real Monsters!" is or "Ren and Stimpy" or even friggin "Dexters Lab!"

You all sons of bitches are getting raised on Spongebob and bad disney movies that can't compare to ******** BAMBI or Aladdin or some other bullshit like that that made my childhood ******** ROCK.

I'll sit here on my throne of superiority thank you.

Suren-kun on his ego:

What ego?

Suren-kun on other people's ego:

What ego's?

Suren-kun on something other then ego's:

Leggo my eggo b***h.

Suren-kun on commercials:

Okay ******** this is the way to make a commercial.

You either take a nice big pair of breasts and slap them on tv with the words of your product on the bottom, with a picture of the product, and a general description, like 'aftershave' or something.

We will BUY IT.

If you're not going to use the hypnotism technique, use the best technique known to man.

The god damn catchy tune that no one can ever forget.

EVER.

....

EVER.

It's ******** stuck in your mind for the rest of your life.

So write to me,
Stick Stickly
P.O Box
963
New York City
New York State!
10108!

Errr you did not just hear that.

Suren-kun on ZOMBIESSSSSSSSS:

Aim for the head.

Suren-kun on the death of everything:

Look I don't care WHO the ******** you are. I lop your god damn head off and you're going to be having ******** PROBLEMS.

If I dismember you and feed you to wolves chances are the PIECES aren't going to magically reform!

Suren-kun ends his rant on... TWILIGHT:

Edward Cullen you ******** f*****t.

How dare you ruin vampires?

Bella you stupid b***h.

How dare you be so stupid as to have a kid that will kill you?

End time: 12:45 am

Suren-kun
Community Member
  • [11/03/11 03:56am]
  • [09/14/09 08:44pm]
  • [09/04/09 03:17pm]
  • [07/07/09 08:45am]
  • [05/21/09 06:24am]
  • [11/17/08 01:23pm]
  • [07/02/08 11:04pm]
  • [05/17/08 10:04am]
  • [05/14/08 01:49am]
  • [04/29/08 09:54pm]


  • User Comments: [2]
    I lol'ed so hard the entire time.


    comment Your Cynical Sweetheart · Community Member · Wed Aug 19, 2009 @ 12:44am
    But! I like Spongebob, Suren! ;~; [I remember all those other shows, and like then, but I likes the Spongebob too!]

    comment Akashuia · Community Member · Mon Nov 22, 2010 @ 04:25am
    User Comments: [2]

     
     
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