Some times you just have one of those days when you let the stupid little things bother or upset you. By you I mean me, that's what I do some days. I never really understand why? Sometimes the subject has meaning or value, but is it really worth getting upset with? Life will incorporate thorns with the roses, but that doesn't mean the roses aren't beautiful. I don't know, its just something I was thinking about. I have been really depressed the last few days. The reason? Well I have not let it bother me that my dad is such a loser he cant even give me away at me wedding, but since I only have 19 days tell 'I do' I have been thinking about it. I used to think I was relatively strong when it came to things like that. I mean why does it matter, its just a short walk on the arm of some one. A few 20 feet, why fret over it right? But if that's what I think then why am I stupid enough to let it bother me? Oh, and I gained weight, so now I am to fat to fit into the wedding dress that I hate anyways. And my sister got angry and took herself out of the wedding and we have no place to live as of yet, and he is working more. Why amongst everything do I feel so alone in the world? I know I'm not, I have really good friends. ( Lenny for one ) and I know whenever I need something it will be taken care of. I'm being stupid and petty over the whole wedding dress thing, but frankly, I HATE the dress with every ounce of me and yet I have to get married in it. Its s funny world when I have to starve and take diet pills just to fit into a dress that I hate, oh well that's life. Isn't it? All these things shouldn't bother me, their just little tiny thorns, but I cant let them go today. Maybe its because I have never left home before and in 20 days I will be moved out and on my own, not to mention maybe moving with the job. I'm letting myself stress, and its pointless really. . . .I think I have found the answer. . . I'm just Crazy, that's all. Simple and fact.
· Tue Apr 28, 2009 @ 07:34pm · 0 Comments