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Not really sure what I should think, or say at this point.. Amber's on her "week vacation", and I doubt I'll be here when she gets back.. (If it's this weekend, that is.)

Honestly, I do miss her. But, do I love her..? I don't think I do..

I mean, is it impossible for me to fall in love with her? Not by a long shot. But so far, she's become a very close friend, and she's someone special to me... but I'm holding back, because of the future...

Is it fair to her? No, it isn't.. especially not since she let her walls down, and has stopped trying to get me to "hate her".. hm.. but I think it'll take me some time to actually develop a true "love" like bond with her. The first time we met was pure infatuation.. I wasn't honestly in love.. and a part of me realized it.

She is doing me good, though.. I'm becoming softer, and less paranoid about the world.. which are both good things; things I've been trying to achieve, but have been unable to thus far.. so, it's working in my favor.

I was reading Chloe's journal.. and I was happy to know that I make her happy.. that's all I could ever want in the world, her happiness. I did have to explain a few things to her on msn though, things I thought she had wrong..but it's all gravy now.

This week is going to be interesting... fun fun and more fun.. and of course, I'm slowly maturing, so my personality is changing bit by bit... heh..