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1. This is how India got its name- The king was having sex with his Mistress while thinking a name of his country and his Mistress asked him: ” Is it IN DEAR?

2. p***s is much better than a credit card because:1 Accepted worldwide 2. Auto reload . 3. Unlimited usage. 4. No Need authorization & 5. No need to sign after used!

3. 4 types of women having sex.-1-. asthmatic,ah..aahh..ah…ahh 2-.0bedient, yes,oh yes..ah yes, 3. –greedy, more..more ..pls 4.-religious,oh god..oh..oh my god ..oh my God!

4. Boy goes for blood test. Nurse takes the sample but can’t find cotton so she sucks his finger! Boy is so happy he asks: Can I get a urine test also?

5. Do you know the most difficult Golf course in the world? Answer: Women’s hole. No matter how many strokes and what style you play, your balls will never go in!

6. Two girls taking shower together. 1st girl: I have so much hair on my ~Censored~ why is your ~Censored~ so clean? 2 nd girl: Would grass ever grow on a busy road?

7. A loving husband had “I love you” tattoed on his d**k. When he got home he showed it to his wife. She said there u go again trying to put words in my mouth.

. 8. Wife reads an article” wow!” A bull can have sex 3000 times a year I wish you could do the same. Hubby replies:” Ask the bull whether he ~Censored~ the SAME cow!!!!?

9. Girl in cinema turns sideway n whisper 2 her boyfriend biggrin man next 2 me is masturbating!”.BF:” Ignore him.” .GF:”I can’t. BF:”Why not?” GF:” He’s using my HAND!”

10 . Different types of voice during sex English: Oh yes Oh yes.American: Yeah baby,yeah !.Indian: Ayo Anma!.Chinese: Ai Yaa! Malay: slow2 sayang ,nanti orang dengar!

11. Schoolgirl: I do not want to take the SEX EDUCATION. Class Teacher: Why not? Schoolgirl: Someone told me the FINAL EXAM would be ORAL!”

12. What is the difference between riding a bicycle & riding a woman? Riding a bicycle u fix ur a** & move ur legs. Riding a woman u fix ur legs & move ur a**!

13. A macho husband was asked “Do you Sleep with other women? He replied:” Hey I sleep only with my wife with the others I stay awake all night!!!

14. Teacher: John, why is your cat at school today? John L crying) I heard the postman tell mum.. when the kid goes to school I’m gonna eat your ~Censored~

15. Naked girl board taxi. Driver stared. Girl scold, never see a naked girl ah ? Driver reply: see before but wondering where u keep yr money to pay taxi fare?.

16. Girl goes 2 repair umbrella. Umbrella man says: UPPER CLOTH HAS TO B REMOVED AND ROD HAS TO B INSERTED. Girl says:- DO ANY THING BUT WATER SHOULDN’T GO IN !!!

17. The sperm wanted to be human very anxiously. One day an opportunity arrive so they rush out very quickly. Suddenly the leader shouted: STOP! My God we are finished. The boss is only masturbating!

18. Man to wife: Business is bad if u learn 2 cook we can remove servant. Wife:
~Censored~! If u learn how to ~Censored~ we can remove driver, gardener & watchman..

19. Man says to wife” I fancy kinky sex ,how about I c** in ur ear! Wife says: No, I might go deaf! Man Says: I’ve been cumming in ur mouth for 20 yrs & ur still talking!.

20. Car Sales Girl says to Call Girl: 1 have to sell a car today or I am ~Censored~.” Call Girl reply:” I have to be ~Censored~ today or I have to sell my car!

21. Good friend is like underwear ,always cover u . Better friend is like a condom, always save u. Your best friend is like VIAGRA: when u r down, he keeps u UP!!

22. A 75 year old man talking to his p***s : we were born 2gether,grown up 2 gether,enjoyed life 2 gether,had lots of fun 2gether,then why did u die before me?

23. c**k say to his two BALLS: I am going to take you with me to a party. BALLS said: You big ~Censored~ liar. You always get INSIDE and leave us waiting OUTSIDE!

24. Condom vs kotek, condom says 2 kotek when u work, my business is in loss for 7 days. Kotex replies- if u fail 2 work once, my business stops for 9 months.