Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

******** Confuse bout my life
Seriously, I'm thinking so hard what I really want do in life
what/who will make happy. all these question.
yeah yet I'm slowly reaching for my weed, my spike pipe
I wonder why do I always reach for drugs or Booze to get rid of these
Problems? Why must my past come back to me?
Why must people tell how their life's are becoming great for them
Why must I listen? and live in a hell? I tried so hard to make it better
but it just gets worst and worst by the minute by the hour and days
Y'all probably reply "screw life get high" or some other lecture bout
how life is so hard I KNOW IT ******** HARD but most people have it made
so easy. where I believe I have a learning disability, it hard for me to understand s**t until it explain to me a few times. My mind wonders off when I'm bored with something. yet I spend hours and possibly days on homework and yet still get 60-70%, seeing that mark crushes me a little more, yet guess what I do I laugh about it outside but inside I wonder if I am a moron, Stupid. It what been driven into my skull, that I'm nothing that I'm a ******** idiot, That I screw up, That I do nothing but ******** up. Guess where most of these words come from my own ******** family MY OWN ******** FAMILY.
oh noes Calvin wears eyeliner he's acts girl let make fun of him. oh noes Calvin bi-sexual let disown him as family.
I basically have no one to go to beside my friends, but at times I don't wanna talk to my friends I want to talk to my cousin's, my family. And no this is not a blog asking for attention. if you think I'm Emo then bye bye, I'm not going to be taking anyone s**t anymore I don't care if you are joking around. you can say bye to Calvin You can say Bye to our friendship. Cause Me personality I'm not going to take it anymore. Err I'm Ending My Rant.