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my journal well this is my thoughts...... ideas.... feelings... funny things are in here..... some disturbing stuff...... (i know wat ur thinking not tht type i mean like deathy wishes xD ok maybe not like tht exactly) ummm and some other stuff :D

Community Member
....... *sigh* .................
*sigh* (yes again xD) anyways.........
man life is sucky!!!!! it sucks....... must people dont understand me for example my mom and dad wats the deal theyre my parents!!! theyre suppose to understand me most of the time but they dont...... ( eek thts sounded fruity as hell! ) anyways my friends dont understand me not my cousins no one understands me sad

they thing tht i dont have any problems tht i life a perfect little life... they think thti dnt understand their problems tht i dnt understand wat i feels to be sad or depressed or stressed out they think tht i dnt no anything and tht y wen they are having a chat about some thing i dnt "understand" they wisper to each other lets change the subject she shouldnt hear this..... pfft! they think im deaf or something like i cant hear anything man well they are dumb grrr............. anyways everyday wen people see me not smilling they automatically think theres something wrong with.... wat is there a problem not smilling? y is it a problem if im not? sure i cant stay with out a smile but u can? wtf! dnt be supposing there is something wrong with me jst because im not smiling!!! (actually there is somthing wrong with me wen im not smilling but thts sometimes....) wat do i have to put an act for u and play this cheery role??? do i have to smilling the whole time?? tht another problem i got on my shoulders..... i feel like i have to play this certain role with different people i have to play this happy role for my parents this innocent role for my teachers and friends and i play different roles for everyone (hehe maybe i should be an actress!!! hmmm ill have tht in mind.... no i cant im get stage frigh easly and im extra shy!! gonk sweatdrop lol) anyways y cant i act like myself around people and not have them think im crazy... weird.... stupid... weird.... dumb... weird.. out of m y mind... o and did i mention wierd??? yeah i think my true friends only understand me...... well i got to go and clean now grrrr....... stressed stressed stressed man i dnt want to clean but i dnt ant to get the computer taken away so i might as well leave!! xD LOL bye..... luv u guys!! heart heart heart blaugh

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