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I have no idea what a Journal Header does so there I like my inability to care.
Bumper Stickers
-If it weren't for physics and law enforcement, I'd be unstoppable.

-Remember: Pillage then burn.

-I'd tell you to go to hell, but I wok there and don't want to see you every day.

-Democrats make better lovers, who ever heard of a good piece of elephant.

-Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee on you while you sleep.

-Stop animal experiments, use lawyers.

-So many stupid people so few comets.

-Closed minds alway seem to be connected to open mouths.

-Never do anything you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.

-I have no desire for money, it's stuff I want.

-The beatings will continue until morale improves.

-Saturday has a morning?

-Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing my whole life.

-Come to the dark side we have cookies.

-Forgive and Forget. But keep a list of the names.

-You can't make a person love you. You can just stalk them and hope for the best.

-I like my men how I like my coffee, ground up and in the freezer.

-If it has tires or testicles it's gonna give you problems.

-I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.

-Reality is where the pizza delivery guy comes from.

-Capital punishment isn't for making examples, it's for making bad people dead.

-Oxymoron #59: Adult Male

-Normal people scare me, but not as much as I scare them.

-I surf, therefore I am!

-Of course I'm out of my mind, it's dark and scary in there.

-Same crap, different day.

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