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Reasons why I’m single.

So as some of you know, I'm some-what of a cam whore. I often post my pictures on a gay website called ChadzBoys. It's a forum for teenager/younger college aged guys to chat and have fun on.

So after posting my most recent photos, this is what someone told me

"
Mind if I give you some contructive criticism?
><

Maybe grow your hair long?
It would take away from some of the more prominent features on your face.

Also, a little exercise? For your stomach and chest? yesh ><

And less feminine poses, you don't have a v****a so stop acting like you do >_________<

I'm just not a fan of those kind of seductive poses coming from guys ^^

But whatever, everyones different

(H)"

:/
It's like he listed all the reasons guys don't like me.
Ugh, that's not cool at all.

Gay guys are so ******** shallow and the great majority of them want sex. Sex is fun (believe me), but I want a damn relationship. Gay men all seem to be attracted to this:

http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/8697/ixskin2518003rr6.jpg

Or some variation of the same thing. I mean, look this guy is HOT and I'm not blaming them for likeing it and I can see why they do....but like..what about me? sad

I mean, I don't want to sound full of it, but I don't think that I'm that unnatractive. I love who I am and I love my body and I love my face and I love my style. I'm not vain at all, but I'm comfortable with myself. If I ever lost weight it'd be just something to do-rather than something I do for other guys....but I feel like I need to. Ugh.
Whenever i see gay guys in real life or online, they're all skinny, some-what buff and toned and s**t. I'm not any of that. I'm average sized with an average body-some-what muscular legs and rather skinny arms with a 34 waist. I enjoy myself. The only thing that I'd really want to change about myslef (pyhsically) is my tummy. If it were tighter-I'd be all good. But that's -it-.

Whenever I'm around bi or gay guys, I always feel so unnatractive. I mean, it's not that i think i'm unnatractive, it's rather than I feel like they're judging me. I mean, I dont know...I'm probably really paranoid, but like...ugh. I don't know. I mean, I've been approached by guys that liked me for what I have, but I still feel like I'm not good enough.

I used to have crazy low self esteem. I don't have it as much, but I still kinda do..which is probably why I'm a cam whore. LOL. I just feel inferior around guys and I get SOOOOOOOOOO SHY. Like, I totally could have flirted with this guy I met the other day, but for whatever reason I couldn't look at him. God, I'm so shy. LOL. But that shyness comes, realy when I feel like they're judging me. I mean, even when they're not. LOL.

But i'm so confused. In the media, we're told that gay men are all about the abercrombie and all about the hollister and looking fierce and s**t-but that's only half of us....right? I mean, gay people in the media are portrayed as being really superficial and I know that some guys aren't like that, but I can't get that image out of my head. It's like wherever I go, it's just PROVED to me left and right. I mean, wyat was awesome. Not superficial at all, but most guys aren't.
sad

Ugh
I needz a non superficial, open minded man.

and I needz it noa.