Okay so last night I had an interesting dream. Last summer, I had dreamt of my crush almost every night (very weird...) but then it had stopped. Then it came back again last night. Only this time instead of me just seeing him and not talking to him, I sat right next to him and talked. Here's the low- down:
It was lunchtime at school. I was sitting alone in my (apparently) normal spot in the janitor's hallway eating my lunch in a chair next to the lunchroom across from the bathrooms. My friends, Josie and Jenna, and another girl (might've been Kailee or Caitlin) were sitting with my crush. I thought I'd just sit next to Josie and Jenna and talk to them (alterior motive too... ninja wink ). So as I was walking over to their table (they were in the corner table next to the window, trash can, and the breezeway), he looked past me and called some more girls over. This hurt me- a lot. But I just kept walking towards them. I ended up sitting next to him (on his left) and said hi to Josie and Jenna. We ate, and I just HAD to ask him something about his older sister. I think he answered, and we ate in silence.
Then things kinda got switched so we were at the second from the wall table, and now I sat in the right corner seat of the table facing the breezeway. (for those who know me- this is our usual spot in the morning...) He was sitting diagonally up from me facing the lunch line. It looked like he wasn't done, but suddenly while we were all eating in silence, he just pushes his food towards the center of the table and walked away to sit with the popular girls at our school. I remember eating a little while longer, then next thing I know I'm walking out of the cafeteria. These people were just standing there, and there were cushions at their feet. I picked them up, and brought them to the special ed. room. But when I got there, they asked me what on earth I was doing with those cushions- that I was stealing them. I was on the verge of tears already before picking up the cushions, and then I almost lost it there in the hallway.
Next thing I know, I'm running full-speed down the 9th grade hallway, looking for the door to the music department. I see that Jenna saw me and is now following me asking me just what I'm doing. I run past the first door, and then when I look in the main door's window, I see Mr. Schulz on his computer in his office, so I run back to the first door (which usually has a huge shelf in front of it) and went through, across the 8 foot long hallway, and into the uniform room. I slam the door, and sink to the floor in tears. Ultra break-down time. Jenna was trying to get in the door, and she kept asking me if she could come in. Eventually I think she forced her way in, and was asking me what the deal was with my crush. (she actually said his name- she has no idea what the deal is with him.)
And then I woke up. I don't think I cried in real life, although I have done so before with sad or scary dreams. Maybe this is my conscience's way of trying to get over him.... what do you think?
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