Dear diary,
Well I am Kim, a junior high school student from an exclusive school here in our town. Well my story started in this kind of way... I met this guy name john. It was recess, I know, I was just sitting there in the canteen waiting for my friends to come. And in other hand I was also preparing myself for the next exam. Yes diary, I met him on our first day of exam. I just notice him but I didn’t know that I was attractive to him. So, a couple of days had past, I thought my feelings for him would be over. But one day, it suddenly change my life....
It was an ordinary day diary, john join this kind of competition in our school, called the battle of math wizards. I got impress diary, because from the guys that I like, he is only one who is different. from that day diary, my feelings for him got deeper and deeper.
diary I am so happy even though he doesn't know about me... even though i am ghost for him...you know, when I saw him smiling... I feel like Im in heaven. But diary, my problem is.... how can I go near to him and talk to him... I know it's easy to introduce yourself but for me it’s hard, it's really hard. So what I have to do for now is to continue my hidden feelings for him...right?
but one day diary. It suddenly change me.... It was intrams on that day diary, I was just sitting there on the garden resting. I notice john keep on roaming around me. i got distracted to him... i couldn't get some sleep.... but finally he stops and looks at me. Then he suddenly walks towards me. And he introduces him self. I got nervous diary, because from all the days and nights of waiting' that has finally come. "" Hi... I’m john....hmmm... sorry; I know it may sound crazy to you. This is only a dare okay."" john said. I replied” what dare?"" and snap....!!!! Diary he kissed me. I got destructed and I forgot myself. It takes an hour for me to recover. Diary...
Well even though my dreams went come true still I have to face the reality right? We are not meant for each other. So I continue my life without him. But my mind keeps me paranoid. I keep on hoping and hoping that someday. All my dreams would come true.
Diary....you know that day came. It’s also intrams... I was there selling my project to the students. Suddenly my friend came and asks something. I thought that he wanted to buy the food. But he hand copped me...
I feel something fishy around me. Because our school having this silly activity called marriage booth while the intrams is going on. Diary we went to our destination, there I saw john standing in front of me. I got nervous of what happen. because.... john is the one who planned this... yes diary we got married on that day but its just sixty second marriage... even though I got mad of what he had done. Still im quite happy because I will able to know him better.
Yes diary we talk and that was my most wonderful day of my life.
""Hi. sorry ha.... my friends plan this...(sigh)that's why we got this... you know... I’m really sorry....""john said. and I replied"" oh.... it's okay...."". Then silence struck us.... "" you know... I really like you"" said john,"" why?"" I replied... "" I don’t know... I suddenly feel this kind of feeling when I met you in canteen. You know on that day I started to like you..."" he replied.... I got flattered of what he said to me diary but.... I feel something different... I feel something that.... I don’t like the feeling that I feel now... I know I been bringing this feeling for a long time..." well Kim....I have something to tell you"" he said,"" what?” I replied then he said"" can you be my girlfriend?"well diary... what words I replied him? Well I said yes diary I know he didn't courted me for long time... but I love him so much and I waited for this day to come. I know I blame my self for the consequences that will come...
Well on that day diary it’s me and john together... my friends already know about it. I feel so happy because they accepted john as my boyfriend.As usual diary... we usually do what boyfriends and girlfriends do but in a different of kind of way. And what's that? We spend our lives and love to each other through using cell phone. Yes diary we communicated our love through cell phone. I know its sound strange, but it’s the only way for us to communicate each other. Because he has his own priorities and I have mine. But diary I thought.... my dreams will never end....
but It’s started in Christmas break diary... he stopped texting me... he stopped calling me... I got worried diary and I keep thinking what things why he didn't texted and called me because, I really love him so much diary...So I waited for how days until the Christmas break end.... when the Christmas break end... I was excited because.... I will be able to speak to him and give me reasons why he didn't texted and called me.... yes diary... me and john talk about our relationship.... you know diary i wish.... i never talk to him... because i feel something different on him... you know i cried on that day diary.... because i got hurt on what said to me... and you know what he said to me? he wanted to break up with me because he doesn't love me any more... I saw in his eyes that he was just lying.... but the way he talks to me I feel that... it's true... that he really doesn't love me anymore...
For five days I cried about him... I feel like... my love for him is just wasted... I feel like i was just played... diary what can I do?? I really damn love him... but even though I got hurt I still continue my life with out him.... but I still feel his presence.... I still remember everything we have done... (Sigh) you know diary... I still keep on waiting for him... i still keep on thinking that he would come back.... when the month of march is coming. I feel happy because john is one of the students that who can graduate. But in other hand I feel so sad because.... I will never see him again. That’s my greatest fear diary... letting him go is so hard....
so our final exam was over.... I was sitting on the lobby waiting for my friends... there john also standing waiting for his best friend pat... I stared at him and think how I wish I never meet him... so I could never experience this pain. Suddenly he wanted to come near me but he suddenly changes his mind. It’s like he wants to tell me something....
Well (sigh) the school days has over I went to school to meet my friend. well my friend is having a make up quiz.... I know john would be there because the seniors had their graduation practice.... for the last time I wanted to see him... yes diary I did see him... we just stared each other... i wanted to cry but i wanted to let it go... then i did.... many hours had past... i told my friend about what happen to me and to john.... there i cried a loud.... because i cant help it.. Suddenly my phone rang... oh!! a voice message came from john.... the message goes like this"" hi, Kim how are you.... well I know I hurted you so much and im so sorry for that... you know.... I still love you but I have to let go... I know our love is wasted because of me... please forgive me""
(sighs) God, I called him about message diary.... luckily he answered...""hello, john"," I said, he answered"" Kim, I am so sorry for everything.... I know I hurted you so much....sorry...sorry"","" its okay" "i replied, then he said"" you know that i still love you... but Kim im so sorry if I have to let this go.... I know I don’t have any reasons....please understand"" diary I cried and cried.... I feel like my world is broken down into pieces...
You know diary I wish that he never gave me that message so that I could pretend... dairy because of him im afraid to love again.... I feel like im the only person here is this world. but when my friends fill that space in my heart.... I learn how to forget him but still he is my heart diary... you know maybe god really loves me that's why I have these friends to care of, to lean on and also to protect of.
So thank you for your time diary.... till next chapter of my life....
Kim, heart
universal_hacker Community Member 
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