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 Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 6:56 pm
The breeze coming from the lake ruffled the soft bronze hair that covered the majority of Aine's body. This part of the lake at this time of night was deserted whenever she came to sit and watch the sunset. Listening as the crickets came out as the orange and red melted into the horizon calmed her heart for but a few minutes each day. Sometimes it helped to get away from Perpetua and her children to think happily back to her own daughter and mate. The Cosma family seemed so content and it broke her heart when she watched the way they interacted with each other.
Aine had come to tolerate the dull ache that the void in her heart caused. The Irish hind had attempted to make a certain amount of peace for herself when she had met Huey Sancho, believing he was so very like her William. He'd made her laugh and it had been nice to feel real emotions for the first time in several years. But Huey had turned Aine down so now she really didn't care if he took a flying leap. If he couldn't return her feelings, why should she even bother to try? She had better things to do with her time than to pine.
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Posted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 12:29 am
Lately, whenever Huey got to playing the harmonica, all he could play was the blues. His new little mion pal, Panza Lewis, vastly preferred the intense and loud jamming sessions Huey used to have, but try as he might, the mion could not cheer Huey up. Now Panza only sat in silence on the mountain hart's back.
Huey generally hated silence, but now, as he wandered lost in thought, he welcomed it. He just had no inspiration to play. All he could think of was that hind that had for whatever reason taken a liking to him. And how much he had hurt her. And yeah, that only brought on the blues.
Huey looked up with golden eyes and felt his heart skip a beat. Well, speak (or rather, brood over) the devil. He stopped walking and stood there for a moment, staring at Aine not far from where he stumbled on in. First thought: flee. But he quickly dashed that. No, that would be cowardly... Then again, she looks like she's have a private little moment here, he wouldn't want to disturb her...
Panza, curious as to why Huey stopped, stood up and chittered curiously, causing Huey to start. "Easy, Panza," he muttered, now reaching a decision. Maybe he could make amends with Aine... Huey gave a sigh, then put on an easy-going smile, trotting over.
"Hey, Aine."
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Posted: Sat Aug 28, 2010 7:17 pm
She was still brooding as was her typical hobby when she was startled by the voice of the herla she'd just been glowering about. Turning slowly, she looked him hard and said, "If it isn't the herla I was just thinking about giving a stern talking to."
Pausing a moment, she rearranged her shocked expression into one of derision and continued, "The king of the arses, Mr. Huey Sancho. Did ye come to stomp on me heart again now, lad? Or were ye just wanting to see what a mess ye've made of me?"
Oh this felt so good to let out, but she didn't want him to know that he really had hurt her. It would give him too much satisfaction and power over her. She could not have that, now could she? Waiting a bit impatiently, she sneered at him some more. Best to put on the offensive than to let him know she was hurting.
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Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2010 12:44 am
That... wasn't the reaction he was expecting. Granted, Huey didn't know what to expect, but wow that sort of stung. And, he thought, that sneer definitely didn't suit her. Ears pulled back, the hurt was obvious on his face as he spoke.
"Cool it! I just wanted to talk," he gave her a half-hearted glare, feeling unjustly insulted, "Look, I can see you're frosted, and if you want, fine, I'll split."
He stepped back a bit, as if to make good on that threat, but didn't take his eyes off of her. "You think I went on partied after I... I shot you down? You think I get my kicks saying no? Look, I'm sorry you feel so clutched and all, but you don't have to give me the royal shaft. I'm sorry. Is that what you want? Think you can get over it now?"
Huey was a bit surprised at himself for that little outburst, and although he felt some regret with how harsh he was, he refused to take it back, standing his ground nervously. Panza, in reassurance, patted the hart's back, eyeing Aine. He certainly didn't like how this female upset Huey.
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Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2010 3:43 pm
Aine felt tears p***k her eyes when she heard him return her nastiness. No, he was not her William and he would never be but when she looked at him she couldn't help but see the small similarities. The way Huey's hair curled ever so slightly; that easy going smile that spread across his face so effortlessly; his dark green coloring... All of it reminded her so much of the mate she'd lost and it killed her when she looked at him. Was it odd that that had spurred her forward in her infatuation and feelings for him? Made her do things with him that he could use back to hurt her?
Probably... And that's why her facade of strength crumpled when he returned just as good as she gave. Turning her face away, she whispered, "Just go away Huey Sancho... Ye make me heart sick with pain and I know it's I who's the arse... I'm sorry for the tongue lashing just now, but please if ye would let me be."
Turning her face outward to the lake, her heart pulled at the memory of the life she'd lost. She knew that at some point she would have to let go of her past, but it was such a hard thing to do.
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 9:46 pm
Okay, Huey probably should have seen that coming. Only he didn't, so the mountain hart stood gaping in surprise as Aine's attitude completely switched. Huey could (usually) deal with herla being angry at him, since he got that a lot back home, but a sad herla, especially one he hurt...
Her wounded voice stung Huey, and he shuffled nervously for a moment, wondering if he should indeed just listen to her and leave. But that didn't seem right, he had to say something... Only, Huey doubted Aine would appreciate the humor in pretending to ask his mion for advice, and his Guardian wasn't really helping right now.
"H-hey, hey now," he decided to just go with it, moving to Aine's side, voice soft and nervous damn it why did he have to be nervous, "you're not an, uh, arse," he chuckled, feeling exceptionally lame. Wow he kind of regretted saying anything at all. But he continued.
"C'mon, Aine, I didn't mean to put you down like that. You just rattled my cage... But now you apologized too, so maybe we can start over now that we're even?" He flashed her a grin despite how terrible he felt. Huey knew what this was all about, he knew they had to settle it, but he didn't want to acknowledge it. Although he felt for Aine, this was too much pressure for the musician.
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 10:13 pm
Aine felt her heart tug when he said her name in that upset sounding voice. That he was upset because of her at all was something that startled the tiny little part of her that still wished he would tell her he'd been lying and that he did want to be with her. But it was useless trying to make him feel the same way, and it would be sort of sick if he did.
Wanting to be with someone because they reminded you so much of someone else? That was not good at all and she really shouldn't expect for it to happen. But she wanted it to, and that was the main reason why she shouldn't talk to him anymore. Deep down, she'd always be wanting him to be William and it wasn't right, even if he did want to go back to the start and redo everything.
"I don't think we can, Huey. I'm much too damaged for ye to want to be friends with." Her voice was muffled with the effort to keep the tears out of her throat. They wanted to claw themselves out, poor down her face and wash away the pain. If she could help it, they wouldn't but even now she felt the moisture in her eyes run over her lids and trickle down her soft cheeks.
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 10:55 pm
His grin nearly faltered, but he gave a scratchy laugh anyway. "Damaged! No way, Aine, I've met some real kookie herla in the day, and you're nothin' like--" oh would you look at that she's crying. Huey abruptly cut himself off when he realized, at first not believing it, then panicking. Why did he laugh? Stupid now was not the time to reminisce.
"Aine! Aw, snap, don't cry Aine!" Panza sat up on Huey's back, concerned, but heck he sure didn't know what to do in this situation. He just watched his friend flounder. "'Course I wanna be your friend, Aine! C'mon, don't cry..." he hesitated for a moment, then nuzzled her cheek, nosing the tears away. "You're not damaged, and I... I wasn't laughing at you, swear."
He blew it. If Aine didn't hate him before, she did now, he was sure of it. As his Guardian laughed, Huey could only berate himself, feeling absolutely helpless. This was just like last time. Any damn time, really. He couldn't make anyone happy, and the hart wondered why she even liked him in the first place. Huey Sancho, guys and dolls, musician and heartbreaker extraordinaire!
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Posted: Sun Sep 05, 2010 12:57 pm
Aine froze when he nuzzled her, her resolve snapping. Leaning into the gesture, she moaned and felt her tears continue to fall. If she closed her eyes and ignored what he said she could almost feel like it was her William... Sighing, she opened sad eyes to look at him. Offering a bitter smile, she shook her head slowly.
"Oh Huey, darlin', ye don't know what yer doing to me." Her voice dropped down a decimal before she continued, "If ye want to be my friend, yer gonna have to be more. Because I'll always want ye to be my mate or lover and not just my friend."
Stepping back from him, she gave him a bitter smile before admitting to him the truth, "Ye remind me of my William, the mate I lost a long time back. If I'm to be anywhere near ye in just the friendly manner, it makes me want more. If ye really want to be friends, ye'll have to try and be more than a friend eventually if not right now. It's why I took such a liking to ye in the beginning, ye know. Ye make me laugh like he did and it breaks my heart."
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Posted: Mon Sep 06, 2010 10:51 pm
Yeah, Huey really couldn't keep herla happy, mostly because he was always leaving them. This, however, was a whole different sort of commitment issue. He pulled away from Aine, heart sinking with guilt and, well, embarrassment. He blushed like a yearling, and hated himself for it, turning his face away. Panza couldn't help chittering now, but Huey ignored it. At that, the mion grumbled and curled up on Huey's back. He hated being ignored and thought this was all very silly. Where was the music?
Huey didn't speak, didn't dare look at Aine, as he thought of what she said. So he apparently reminded Aine of her dead mate. Wow that heaped plenty of pressure on. And because of that, she wanted him? That is to say, really wanted him. More than he was willing to give. Add even more pressure to a steadily rowing mound of pressure Huey Couldn't Deal With. He turned her down before because he couldn't see himself in a relationship. That was hard enough. But this was a... a different sort of relationship.
Huey didn't know what to make of this. Didn't know what to say. His first thought was, he felt used. Is that the only reason she liked him? Because of this William hart? But he liked Aine, sure. He just wasn't sure if he liked her that much. Especially with what she just admitted. The fact that they couldn't just be friends, all because he happened to resemble some dead buck. When Huey finally turned to Aine and spoke, his voice was timid and vulnerable, as he felt himself folding under the pressure. If there was one thing Huey couldn't take, it was pressure.
"I... I'm sorry, Aine. I don't know if I can do that," he spoke cautiously, trying to hide his accusing edge now, as he didn't want Aine crying. Guardians, no, he didn't need that right now. "I'm not William, and I never will be. I don't think I can ever live up to that," he gave a shaky laugh, only quickly glancing up to meet her eyes, before looking back to the ground, "I don't want to disappoint you, and I don't want to get into something I--we might regret," he ended awkwardly, as though he had more to say, but changed his mind.
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Posted: Mon Sep 06, 2010 11:04 pm
Aine shook her head and laughed, "Huey I know ye remind me of him but not enough for that to be the only reason I want to be with ye. The fact that ye remind me of him in the first place attracted me to ye. It still does, but that's not why I'd want to be yer mate. I want to be with ye because yer the only one who can make me feel much anything at all. I want to feel something, anything. Do ye know how I lie and mask it all? How I'm always lying and faking emotions?"
She took a break and shook her head, nuzzling his cheek. "Don't be angry with me Huey, I just don't want to be alone. Do ye understand?"
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Posted: Sat Sep 18, 2010 1:26 pm
Huey was surprised to hear Aine actually laugh, shyly lifting his head and frowning in worry at her words. She was so casual about it... He allowed the nuzzle but looked away, resolving to be honest, even if it was hard. This was like an intervention or something, he thought glumly.
"Nah, Aine, I'm not mad. It's just... I'm worried, that's what. You shouldn't fake, Aine," he looked at her pleadingly, realizing there was more to this than he initially thought, "You mean, all those times you were happy, it was all a bit?" He paused, trying to think of the best way to go about saying this, unsure of what the hell kind of advice he could give.
"I don't... I don't think it's good, to rely so much on other herla to be happy," he tried not to wince, that sounded pretty harsh out loud, "I mean, I know being lonely is a real drag," boy was it ever, "but..." he didn't even know where he was going with this anymore. This was all so much.
"Aine, you're not alone. I'm here for you," he tried smiling at her, despite how torn he felt, "And you have others, I'm sure. Or you could make other friends, I don't know. But, you don't have to be alone, and you don't have to lie, is what I'm saying. Please, could we start over, as friends? And could you be actually happy, for real? I don't know if... anything will ever happen between us, but I'll always be there for you, Aine. I want you to know at least that much is true, on my end." Okay, there. That was some commitment he'd be willing to try. Baby steps, Huey, baby steps.
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