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 Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 7:22 pm
Although I’ve grown,
And the years have shown…
I didn’t notice as years fly,
How things change, tears we cry,
How seasons shift and children grow,
Things change between the people I know,
Things lose their taste,
Things go to waste,
Things gather dust and things decay,
Even through all our dismay,
I didn’t notice the mark that time had made…
As we get older… the colors fade.
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Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 3:15 pm
NIce idea.
It lost its rhyme scheme somewhere at the end, unless that was intentional. And the whole meter thing...nonexistant, except for in the couplets. And as for couplets strung together like that...I don't think that's the best idea for this poem. Very few could pull that off.
The organization needs some work. The idea was lovely though.
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Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 9:54 pm
Kirby is right, it is a bunch of couplets with no particular meter. I really, really loved the sentiment you expressed in this one, though. You were right.
The first two lines don't really make sense when you look at the third.
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Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 10:35 am
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