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 Posted: Wed Apr 16, 2008 4:16 pm
A few years ago someone I used to converse with used to freely interpret some of my dreams. I never asked for him to do so, he just did it out of kindness. One thing he told me repeatedly was that I was angry. I always dismissed it because I rarely ever felt angry, and no matter how much I searched for anger in my mind, I could only find tranquility.
After years of meditation practice, I suddenly find that my high tolerance for things that easily bother most people is almost gone. I'm angry almost all the time. Little things that may annoy others throw me into a fit of rage. After today at home and at work, I feel like I've gone so deep into anger that I'm actually experiencing a new emotion that I'm at a loss to name or describe. It's uncomfortable, I want it to go away before I do something stupid.
The thing is, luckily I've been exposed to some very good teachers (through their writing) and I know to stick with meditation because sooner or later I will uproot this anger in its entirety. It may be that I never saw the anger before, but meditation began to wear away the surface of my mind to expose it, and now that I'm getting down to its roots I can see it is vast.
This anger feels so much bigger than I am, and it's such a surprise to find. I don't know where it came from, or how it got there. I don't have any memory whatsoever of ever repressing so much anger.
Wish me luck as I go to war against this internal enemy, as I brandish Manjusri's sword and destroy these afflictions.
Om A Ra Pa Ca Na Dhih
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Posted: Thu Apr 17, 2008 5:23 pm
Keep up your meditation, and I'd add a little reading of the Metta Sutra every now and then. Good luck keeping the anger at bay. smile
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Posted: Sat Apr 19, 2008 9:17 pm
I really hope you can overcome it. =) Best of luck.
I suppose I somewhat know how you feel. I've recently become quite angry as well, for the past month or so.. But I know it's because I'm mentally tired from my recent every day life itself. Busy, busy, busy. =P
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Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 5:49 pm
Nirguna the Heart A few years ago someone I used to converse with used to freely interpret some of my dreams. I never asked for him to do so, he just did it out of kindness. One thing he told me repeatedly was that I was angry. I always dismissed it because I rarely ever felt angry, and no matter how much I searched for anger in my mind, I could only find tranquility. After years of meditation practice, I suddenly find that my high tolerance for things that easily bother most people is almost gone. I'm angry almost all the time. Little things that may annoy others throw me into a fit of rage. After today at home and at work, I feel like I've gone so deep into anger that I'm actually experiencing a new emotion that I'm at a loss to name or describe. It's uncomfortable, I want it to go away before I do something stupid. The thing is, luckily I've been exposed to some very good teachers (through their writing) and I know to stick with meditation because sooner or later I will uproot this anger in its entirety. It may be that I never saw the anger before, but meditation began to wear away the surface of my mind to expose it, and now that I'm getting down to its roots I can see it is vast. This anger feels so much bigger than I am, and it's such a surprise to find. I don't know where it came from, or how it got there. I don't have any memory whatsoever of ever repressing so much anger. Wish me luck as I go to war against this internal enemy, as I brandish Manjusri's sword and destroy these afflictions. Om A Ra Pa Ca Na Dhih
Well... maybe it's hormones? I dunno'~ But it could just be that your going through a little phase, trying taking a hammer to... a... I dunno'... bannana or jawbreaker or something
or break things! Yayyyy! Not really, but I suppose you need to drain the anger in a positive way~ Try turning all the pent up rage into something positive, like, I dunno'... Maybe you have work you need to do in your yard or something? Why not get angry and start working? Or you can break stuff! Whatever works for you XD Hope that helps~
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Posted: Sun May 04, 2008 1:10 am
I tend to refer to myself as an angry buddhist(to myself). I also tend to tell people that I'm the worst buddhist they'll ever meet if they find out I am one.
I like to keep this on hand, so I'll share.
For Warmth
I hold my face in my two hands.
No, I am not crying.
I hold my face in my tow hands
to keep the loneliness warm---
two hands protectin,
two hands nourishing,
two hands preventing
my soul from leaving me
in anger.
Thich Nhat Hanh
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Posted: Sun May 04, 2008 11:24 am
A good solution for anger is when your meditating and your very quiet minded confront the anger and ask yourself how it benefits you, anger never benefits so eventually you can get rid of it by will.
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