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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 8:03 am
Taken from: http://www.details.com/sex-relationships/porn-and-perversions/200907/how-internet-porn-is-changing-teen-sex
Like most guys of my generation—I'm on the downslide to 40—I have fond memories of my first experience with pornography. I was 14 years old and my best friend had just discovered his father's secret stash. We gathered in his basement and delicately turned the pages as if they might disintegrate. I asked him if I could borrow a few mags "just for the night," which in hindsight was a pretty bold request. I was, after all, essentially announcing my intention to masturbate. Slipping past my parents with the stack of old Hustlers stuffed inside my jacket, I somehow made it to my bedroom and, not believing my good fortune, stayed up all night relishing the spoils.
To the modern 14-year-old, the scenario would be laughably quaint: There's no stash to be hidden these days. You can "clear history," along with any residual shame, in one click. At each adolescent fingertip is an inexhaustable stream of high-def images and Flash video—some 400 million pornographic Web pages in all. The sheer breadth is staggering: If you watched porn 24 hours a day, for example, it would take you several years just to get caught up on the 13,588 professional titles released in the United States in 2005 alone. Plenty more is out there in bulk on the digital shelf, no credit card required: bestiality, piss-drinking, ********, bukkake gang bangs, triple a**l penetrations—all exhaustively cross-referenced. Any day now, some poor kid may actually go blind masturbating.
The awkward truth, according to one study, is that 90 percent of 8-to-16-year-olds have viewed pornography online. Considering the standard climax to even the most vanilla hard-core scene today, that means there is an entire generation of young people who think sex ends with a money shot to the face. It's hard to pinpoint exactly where the age divide falls, but it's safe to say that the first purebred guinea pig to have grown up never knowing a world without fisting on demand is probably around 22 years old.
By the time they're in high school, America's porn-fed youth have already amassed an encyclopedic knowledge of smut. Seth Rogen, cowriter of Superbad—which features a now-classic scene of teenage boys graphically discussing hard-core sites—recently told me that one of his favorite pastimes is trolling porn message boards. "It's hilarious how much these kids know," Rogen says. "There'll be arguments like 'This is classified as gonzo, but I would say it's more of a feature-BDSM. Also, they say this clip is taken from Handjobs #8, but this scene was actually first featured in Killer Grips #7.'"
Rogen might as well have been talking about brothers Travis and Cody, typical 21-year-old college students in Florida who tell me there's one criterion at the top of their list when it comes to picking a ******** buddy. "Pubic hair is disgusting," Travis says. "Girls should keep their vaginas porn-star trim." Cody describes his first real-life ejaculate-to-the-face finale like this: "It was the happiest moment of my young life. There is just something about blowing a load in a chick's face that makes you feel like a man."
For most men over 30, facials aren't something you actually do. They're like car chases or hurling someone through a plate-glass window—the difference between cinema and life. But the ubiquity of porn has blurred the line. According to a study by the Centers for Disease Control, the number of heterosexuals having a**l sex nationwide has almost doubled since 1992.
But boys have always been perverts. Since a facial requires a female to receive it, the real story might be the apparent surge in the number of willing participants. In Immersion: Porn, a documentary by New York photographer Robbie Cooper, 22-year-old Lindsay sees the act as empowering to women. "Even if she has eight dicks on her face, she's still the queen of those eight dicks," she says. "I definitely like come on the face."
Former State Department staffer Mary Eberstadt, writing in Policy Review, compares the prevailing attitudes about porn to the general consensus on tobacco in the 1960s. "[Porn] is widely seen as cool, especially among younger people, and this coveted social status further reduces the already low incentive for making a public issue of it."
Of course, porn doesn't cause cancer, though it may cause homemade sex tapes and hot cam-on-cam IM action (playing in a locked suburban bedroom near you). And it almost certainly causes cell-phone-picture taking: According to a 2008 survey, one in five teenagers have sent an explicit photo of themselves to someone else or posted one online.
The sea change is perhaps nowhere more evident than in the burgeoning crop of young actresses flocking to the industry. Joanna Angel of BurningAngel.com, a veteran porn actress at 28, describes doing a three-way recently with a 19-year-old girl new to the business. "It was her first scene ever, so I was like, 'Don't worry—just follow my lead,'" she recalls. "But then the scene started, and the way she was giving a blow job and the things she was saying and the way she was moaning—I was like, 'What the ********?' When I was 19, I was not giving blow jobs that were nearly that exciting. The girls these days just seem to come to the set porn-ready."
In fact, "porn-readiness" is now a source of pride. While on tour promoting her memoir, Jenna Jameson was reportedly stunned that 13-year-old girls kept telling her she was their role model. In a survey of 1,000 British girls between the ages of 15 and 19, roughly 25 percent said they aspired to become professional lap dancers. "Dirty Angel," 22, who writes a blog called Tastes Like Kisses and started surfing porn in her early teens, says, "It was watching [adult star] Heather Brooke that gave me the mind-blowing skills I have now when it comes to giving a blow job."
To those of us who came of age in the eighties and nineties—the dinosaurs once naïvely content with even the most terrible, chafing teen hand job—it feels a bit like looking down from an attic window onto the Haight-Ashbury during the Summer of Love. Let the young have their Twitter and their Jonas Brothers—we have no interest. But this kind of hurts. Of course, we're not all missing out on the fun. The Brett Ratners, the Silvio Berlusconis, the thirtysomething divorcés of the world—they will carry the mantle for us and hopefully report back. At least those in good cardiovascular health.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 11:05 am
Another good one. Porn is easily available and socially acceptable. A lot of young people think it's the norm, or even mandatory, to do things they see in porn. A lot of girls feel ashamed of their pubic hair, and a lot of guys don't understand what it's for.
So they might have some wild and kinky sexual encounters, but their overall knowledge of their body, what feels good to them, and what feels good to their partner is actually pretty poor a lot of the time. Because instead of communicating, they just assume they're supposed to do it like the people in the porn do.
I see so many young couples who can't even figure out how to communicate or experiment in bed because they've had all their ideas spoon fed to them thus far. And I honestly feel bad for them. I went into sex never having seen a porn video. I communicated. I knew what I liked. I found out what he liked. And that meant we had a long-term, fulfilling, and healthy sex life rather than just a couple of kinky and awkward encounters.
I'm not saying that porn is bad and automatically takes away a person's ability to communicate. The issue is more about people's ability to tell reality from fantasy. People who know porn isn't necessarily real will usually still communicate, experiment, and be just fine. Its the people who don't know reality from fantasy that are the problem. And unfortunately, young people are more likely to fall into that category. So if a teen wants to watch, that's ok with me. But I highly recommend having a bit of a sex education before viewing and using porn as entertainment, not an instruction guide.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 3:23 pm
to Nikolita, i really enjoyed reading this article. it gave me quite a bit of information about porn and how it affects youth today. Ive been into porn for about three years and im 16 and i dont think it is that big of a problem. I was really disturbed at the whole 25 percent of 15-19 year old girls aspiring to be lap dancers. Most people would say that its good they know what they want to be when they grow up but its scary that they dont want to stride to be doctors or scientists or some other stereotypicaly good carreer choice that could be perfect for them.
to Lorien, in my area porn is not very acceptable socially at all. if some one admits to watching it or masturbating to it, they most likely will get riduculed about it unless it is to the right people. Last year there was a kid that everybody makes fun of (not me though, mainly because hes never done anything against me or my friends) who got caught masturbating in the school bathroom. Now i know what you're thinking, a lot of people masturbate in the school bathrooms but this was different. He was doing it in the middle of the bathroom where anyone could see and the dean of students was the one who caught him. needless to say he was riducule relentlessly. I kinda feel sorry for him cuz he was just doing a natural thing. Over the next few days i found out a lot of people think its an ok thing to do and they feel that its perfectly fine to do it. Yet people still get ridiculed all the time.
I feel as though society is being steered in the right direction. It wasnt too long ago that sex and pornography and masturbation was very taboo. Im glad that things are changing but I can just hope that the change quickly and soon
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 4:01 pm
Senshi82 to Lorien, in my area porn is not very acceptable socially at all. Yeah, I'd say porn is socially acceptable in America in general. But there are certainly going to be places where it is more or less so. For example, the bible belt might not take to it as kindly as NYC! And even in places where it is socially acceptable, it's not going to be something you'll want to talk about with everyone. I'm pretty open about sexuality. But I don't really want to talk about it too in depth with my mother or a boss either, you know? xp Even my friends vary in terms of just how open they are and exactly what I can talk to them about. Senshi82 Last year there was a kid that everybody makes fun of (not me though, mainly because hes never done anything against me or my friends) who got caught masturbating in the school bathroom. Now i know what you're thinking, a lot of people masturbate in the school bathrooms but this was different. He was doing it in the middle of the bathroom where anyone could see and the dean of students was the one who caught him. needless to say he was riducule relentlessly. I kinda feel sorry for him cuz he was just doing a natural thing. Over the next few days i found out a lot of people think its an ok thing to do and they feel that its perfectly fine to do it. Yet people still get ridiculed all the time. Yikes. I can't say I feel sorry for the kid. If he wasn't even in a stall or anything, then he was asking for it. Masturbation is very normal and healthy. But that does not mean it should be done out in the open. Peeing, pooping, periods, and having sex are all normal and natural too. But there are a wide variety of diseases that can be spread through bodily fluids. So we do have to exercise some self control and cleanliness, even with those natural, normal, and healthy things. We also have to keep in mind the comfort levels of those around us. It's a respect issue. Very small children and little old ladies, for example, probably don't want to walk in and see a teen masturbating in a semi-public place! xp So as normal and healthy as it may be, it's still best to do it alone or in front of someone who is consenting to watch, in a safe place where no one else is going to walk in accidentally, and in such a way that you can contain or control your bodily fluids. It would have been best for the kid to wait until he got home. But if he was really hot and bothered, a stall would have been the next best choice. Doing it in the open shows an unusual lack of self control and respect. Senshi82 I feel as though society is being steered in the right direction. It wasnt too long ago that sex and pornography and masturbation was very taboo. Im glad that things are changing but I can just hope that the change quickly and soon I agree. It's great that we can talk about things more openly than our parent's generation did. Kids are a lot more educated now than they used to be if they live in areas where good sex classes are taught in school. I hope the rest of the schools get on board quickly and start having full sex ed classes. But there's also a fine line. I really don't want to have it get to the point where nothing is taboo. I wouldn't want to walk into the public library and see people having sex on the table with toddlers walking around. I would not want to set my lunch tray in a puddle of semen on a lunch table. I would not want to sit next to a naked menstruating woman at work. I don't want someone pooing on the front step of my home. Etc. wink
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 6:05 pm
Aside from jealousy, this is the reason I've always discouraged my boyfriend from watching porn. The assumption that what is done in porn is what is supposed to be done in real life. I don't like that. I wouldn't want to be expected to do things like what they do in porn, or be expected to shave all the time, or any of those things. It's so much better to find out together what you like than to just do things that you've seen online and think that's what you're supposed to do. In that sense, I think older generations were more fortunate that they didn't have all these influences. I think it's too easy for underaged people to watch porn. Then they grow up with the idea that all women should shave, or they should all have size DD boobs, etc. I do realize not everyone who looks at porn will make those assumptions, but I think assumptions like that are contributed to by porn. As for me I never watched any of it. Most seems to be geared towards men but even so, I've never liked seeing random strangers naked and having sex. I will look at cartoon/hentai stuff occasionally, and I don't mind of my boyfriend looks at that; it doesn't bother me to see drawings for whatever reason. Also I think when it is not real people it is less of a blurred reality/fantasy line. They aren't real people and therefore it isn't realistic.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 6:47 pm
@ Drumgasmic Monkeyguy - You're most welcome, I'm glad you enjoyed the article. biggrin
When I was about 14 or 15, I had what I now call a porn addiction. I would go on the family computer when it was in the evening, when my parents were napping in front of the TV or they'd gone to bed at night, and I would watch porn. I wouldn't usually masturbate or anything, I'd just watch and get really turned on. Then I would use Limewire or Morpheus, or another download program, and look for more and more clips to watch. I'd never been exposed to sex really, and sex was a huge taboo topic in my family, so I'd never seen it before aside from whatever I found on my own.
I forced myself to stop when I was doing searches on my download program of choice, and realized I'd seen all the clips that were coming up.
Later on when I started dating for the first time, I used to save hentai pictures on the family computer to send to my boyfriend. Thankfully I never got caught. sweatdrop That would've been a really crappy situation.
I'm 23 now, and my boyfriend is 25. We're both old enough to know that porn is not realistic, and that while it might be fun to watch or learn tips from, in the end it's to be taken with a huge grain of salt.
I don't mind if my boyfriend were to watch porn, but I'd rather watch it with him if he wants to watch it. mrgreen Then we can share and enjoy together. Thankfully he doesn't really watch it on his own, though he knows where to find good stuff thanks to his years as a teenager.
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Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 9:32 pm
i read this article and im am so wowed. my first porno was at like 9. girls were having sex in school bathrooms in high school sex to the point where they took the doors off the hinges. i dont see why little girls want to be lapdancers. also to the guy rockin with his c**k out and got talked about why not go to a stall.
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