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It's kind of bizarre for me reading this...

I have a daughter... but I never wanted kids. I still don't feel maternal at all. I think quite a bit of it is due to PPD that never got treated, but I don't feel like I feel the way most mom's do with their children. Don't get me wrong, I love my daughter more than I thought I possibly could love another human being but... I don't know, something is just kind of off.

I must be some kind of anomoly. Didn't like kids, never wanted kids, had one anyways, still doesn't like kids or want to be anywhere near them(with the exception of her own). sweatdrop

I have to disagree with this. I'm no expert, but I would say that using nothing but the Pill is too risky. I'd say you should use more than one method of contraception if you can, for example the pill and condoms. I know the Pill is 90-something % effective and condoms, what, 97%? But if you DO NOT want to get pregnant, take every precaution you can.

I'm saying this because I've had very bad luck recently. I was using just condoms because other methods were no good for me. I was being as careful as I could be, made sure they weren't broken, etc.

I had the implant put in my arm last month (Implannon) and it's 99.9% effective (the only recorded problems are people already pregnant when they have it implanted). My period was due a few days afterwards, but it didn't arrive. I knew the implant could screw up periods, but not that quickly surely. I took two pregnancy tests over the next two weeks, both turned up negative, so I thought I was in the clear.

A few days after the second pregnancy test, I had a miscarriage.

It must have been just before I had the implant in, because it couldn't have been more than 5 weeks. I thought back and could remember there had been a time I thought the condom had spilled, but I hadn't been sure it was worth bothering about at the time. Hindsight's 20/20 of course.

I've had periods of broodiness before, now it's turned into a sort of sad broodiness. I didn't want to become pregnant, but I still feel sad for the potential lost.

That said, I'm pro-choice. I know it was barely the size of a baked bean at that stage. I don't think it was a baby, but the potential of a baby. It makes me more pro-choice because I can see why someone else could go through the same thing and think "Oh well, it was nothing anyway" and why tell them otherwise? It's their 'thing', it's whatever they think it is. If they treat is as a potential baby, it's a potential baby, and so on.

It may have been the size of a baked bean, but it was my baked bean. I don't think I could have had an abortion if it had been a viable pregnancy, but that's just me.


Anyway, ever since then, I've wanted to be more careful. Nothing makes you more careful than a pregnancy scare . . . especially one ending like this. I don't want other girls to have to go through something like this before they become more careful. There's too much of this "It could never happen to me" attitude.

Tsami: my sister got pregnant using just condoms, too. She had an abortion and went on the Pill, and although she's more reliable than I am with it (I think) she's had more than three pregnancy-free years and I've had more than one. I am sorry to hear about your miscarriage, though. <3

Condoms are 97% perfect use, 85% average use. Pills are 99.9% perfect use, about 95% average use I think. Most places say if you miss a pill, you're probably safe but to use condoms for a week or so too. Which sort of reminds me, I have to take a pregnancy test before I get my pill changed. Joyous!

On the subject of contraception, most recent information includes condom-in-a-can, and a female one that you just spray on your arm every day. Interesting.

Also, another tip that people don't often know: if you carry a condom in your wallet just in case, you should probably change it at least every two months - the friction rubs tiny holes in it.

On the subject of pain during sex: I only really get that if I've got a bad angle, or if I need the toilet, generally. About vaginas... I reassured my younger sister recently that hers was normal, because she'd seen a friend's and it was different (not sure about my older sister, but I definitely have large labia minora and had the same concern, because it doesn't look 'neat' like most of the pictures you see). And I didn't know what a clitoris was until I was fifteen.

Of course, when I discovered that oversight, I then learned everything I could about sex and masturbation and genitals, and I'm still learning new stuff. Knowledge is ALWAYS power!

(What was truly hilarious was my non-virgin friend asking my sixteen-year old virgin self how to get her boyfriend to be more dominant in bed... I was like GO TALK WITH HIM PLZKTHX!)

I meant about the condoms as a general thing, it's surprising how many people don't know...

As for no condoms, me and my partner have no STDs, and the pill is really effective, plus after we tried it it was better without. Of course you can never be too careful, but it's just up to the person. The only problem I have with my pill is the whole no-sex-drive but hopefully switching will solve that.

Of course, if me and my partner broke up and I moved on to someone else, I'd use condoms again. It's irresponsible to not use protection unless you're trying to get pregnant, I think. But yeah, I've heard of too many condom accidents to want to rely on just them. Plus pill was free and condoms aren't. >.<

Really? Most common complaint I hear is weight gain. (Yes, that goes for me too. >.< I'm just working harder to combat it than I would do otherwise.)

It sucks.

But on a happy note, seeing the doctor to change my pill tomorrow! : D

redface Forgot about the weight gain. Yes, obviously, that's the most common. Libido loss comes in second, then.
Changing to a lighter pill did help in both problems, for me. Fingers crossed it does the same for you.

I got on the pill after my abortion, but I felt that the pill was protection against pregnancy enough, so I just went with it. I had been on it a couple years before, but you never want to stay on it for too long, so I was single for a long stretch of time & didn't feel like paying for it anymore & just stopped. For the first year w/ my fiance, I wasn't on it, got pregnant, aborted & said "plz to b having pillz again" lol. Its been workin good since. smile